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Posted by: ClayPerrine Nov 11 2004, 11:36 AM

You might have a 914 if the police are constantly pulling you over to check for dead bodies because the car stinks so bad.

You might have a 914 if your own mother would rather walk ten miles to your house than ride in the car.

You might have a 914 if your mechanic hugs himself everytime you pull up in your car.

You might have a 914 if every time you pull into your local Pep Boys, everyone asks you if you won the demolition derby?

You might have a 914 if every time you drive it people think it's on fire and call 911 because it smokes so bad.

You might have a 914 if you try to take it to an autocross and they tell you that you can't run that piece of crap.

Posted by: 736conver Nov 11 2004, 11:50 AM

You might have a 914 if your wife asks will that thing in the garage ever get finished

You might have a 914 if you take piles of rust to road for trash pick-up

You might have a 914 if people ask you what kind of Volkwagen it is

Posted by: sanman Nov 11 2004, 11:52 AM

you might own 2 914 if you have 8 jack stands.

Posted by: Joe Ricard Nov 11 2004, 12:00 PM

or you WILL own jack stands if you have a 914
You might own a 914 if you hang out here.
You might own a 914 if you have one car and boxes and boxes of parts from previous cars.
You might own a 914 if you have at least one extra engine you want to hot rod. ( I got 3)

Posted by: Ferg Nov 11 2004, 12:03 PM

You might own a 914 if the gas station attendent comes out and asks you what they heck you are doing, and if your going to fill a gas can, it needs to be on the ground., it's da rules.

Posted by: boxstr Nov 11 2004, 12:03 PM

You might have a 914 if thoughts of a 6 or V8 fill your head.
CCLINIHAVEA914

Posted by: Headrage Nov 11 2004, 12:06 PM

You might have a 914 if you have a nice garage but the new benz is parked in the driveway.

Posted by: Ferg Nov 11 2004, 12:06 PM

You might own a 914 if you ever wondered if you could really drive underneath a semi trailer like the bandit.

Posted by: sanman Nov 11 2004, 12:15 PM

you might have a 914 if your target top speed 100 mpm

you might have a 914 if you WANT to get a Ticket to prove you did it.

you might have a 914 if you have nightmares about gitting cought in the rain

you might have a 914 if you swear you can feel a 1.5hp increase

you might have a 914 if you thinktakingit to any shop is equivilent to the Bramuba Triangle( never see it again)

you might own a 914 if you think its a real Porsche

Posted by: Ferg Nov 11 2004, 12:18 PM

you might own a 914 if, when you see another one on the road, you swing a 180 and chase it down to say HI

Posted by: mike_the_man Nov 11 2004, 12:21 PM

Posted by: Carl Nov 11 2004, 12:32 PM

You might have a 914 if you know what kitty litter is really used for.
You might have a 914 if the blue fog in the car means the heater's on.
You might have a 914/6 if no radio is a good thing.
You do have a 914 if the wife hates the thing in the garage.
You do have a 914 if the clutch cable snapped.
You do have a 914 if you can't find the top bolt to the starter.

You don't have a 914 if you've never had to brace yourself around a turn ...

Posted by: Kevan Nov 11 2004, 12:37 PM

You might own a 914 if it dies on you in the mountains at 2:00 am because of an electrical problem.

Posted by: mikerose Nov 11 2004, 12:46 PM

Posted by: mack914 Nov 11 2004, 12:46 PM

You might have a 914 if it's the last car on earth. Just joking, relax.

Posted by: SLITS Nov 11 2004, 01:19 PM

You might have a 914 if your eyes are full of greasy sand

You might have a 914 if your hands are cut and bloody from changing the alternator.

You might have a 914 if you can no longer see the outline on your club hat.

You might have a 914 if you mark your territory with oil every place you park.

You might have a 914 if at stoplights someone yells out "It's a classic MG isn't it?

You might have a 914 if you travel far distances to commiserate with other You might have a 914 owners.

Posted by: dinomium Nov 11 2004, 01:28 PM

you might own a 914 if you refer to a drywall knife as a defroster
you might own a 914 if you decide to cut a hole in a nice interionr to access something that routinely breaks (clutch tube mounts)
you might own a 914 if you tell some one what kind of car you have and you get this response: Porsche 914
you might own a 914 if your jackstands are on the last notch and sitting on at least four chuncks of wood, AND you don't even notice the wobble when the compressor kicks on!
You might own a 914 if your wife asks WHY THE @#$* did you just buy ANOTHER set of wheels for a car that you haven't drivin in TWO EFFEN years?!?!
and finally:
you mingt own a 914 if when you look at the dismanteled rust bucket, you see a gleaming sexy car (very simular to BEER GOGGLES!)

Posted by: mudfoot76 Nov 11 2004, 01:34 PM

Posted by: scruz914 Nov 11 2004, 01:36 PM

QUOTE(Ferg @ Nov 11 2004, 10:06 AM)

You might own a 914 if you ever wondered if you could really drive underneath a semi trailer like the bandit.

LMAO So I'm not the only one!

Posted by: scruz914 Nov 11 2004, 01:37 PM

QUOTE(Kevan @ Nov 11 2004, 01:37 PM)

You might own a 914 if it dies on you in the mountains at 2:00 am because of an electrical problem.

I think you've hijacked that from the "you might own a Triumph Spitfire if..." thread

Posted by: Stutgart46 Nov 11 2004, 01:43 PM

You might own a 914 if you always smell like you just mowed the yard.

Posted by: Ferg Nov 11 2004, 02:32 PM

You might own a 914 if you carry a long screwdriver whose only purpose it to spark the starter.

Posted by: Carl Nov 11 2004, 02:43 PM

Posted by: neo914-6 Nov 11 2004, 02:46 PM

You might own a 914 if you don't care what you look like or what people think...

Posted by: mikerose Nov 11 2004, 02:58 PM

You might own a 914 if you carry a long screwdriver whose only purpose it to spark the starter.

Posted by: jr91472 Nov 11 2004, 05:14 PM

you might own a 914 if the POR-15 rep refers to your order as "the usual"

Posted by: cooltimes Nov 11 2004, 05:40 PM

You might have a 914 if you are full of bull and let everyone know you do by posting 914 posts a week.
You might have a 914 if you use Arm and Hammer as primer on the engine shelf and battery tray.
You might own a 914 if strange group of people wanted to save it from a crusher and gave one to you.
You might have a 914 and disguise yourself as a bunny with long ears in hope of not being recognized.
You might have had a 914 if you parked it last year and came back finding large heap of rusty metal.

Posted by: Jenny Nov 11 2004, 05:55 PM

Posted by: grantsfo Nov 11 2004, 06:04 PM

You are a 914 owner if you can balance an engine on your floor jack
You are a 914 owner if you have developed the “6th sense” on when to accelerate and when to brake
You are a 914 owner when you know to catch the engine lid when you pull the release
You are a 914 owner if you actually know how to use the heater and ventilation controls
You are a 914 owner when your trunk has the following: Spare accelerator cable, clutch cable, distributor cap and rotor, relays and fuses.
You are a 914-4 owner if you get nervous every time you go over 5000 rpm
You are a 914 owner if you obsess on 5 lug conversions
You are a 914 owner if you know not to leave ignition on to listen to your radio
You are a 914 owner if “momentum car” is part of of your vocabulary
You are a 914 owner when you drive a side shifter tranny and think its an improvement
You are a 914 owner if you know it will cost $25,000 and two years to do a proper 6 conversion.

Posted by: Howard Nov 11 2004, 06:11 PM

OK, but at least you're NOT this: Sorry, Grant, just noticed your other car


Attached image(s)

Posted by: dlo914 Nov 11 2004, 06:51 PM

Posted by: bryanc Nov 11 2004, 06:57 PM

Your a 914 owner if you know the function of all of the fuses by feel.
Your a 914 owner if you can synchronize carbs while standing on the seats pressing the accellerator.
Your a 914 owner if you can smell the onslaught of rust.
Your a 914 owner if you can adjust your valves in 30 minutes while takin' care of a baby.

--bryan

Posted by: jimtab Nov 11 2004, 10:08 PM

You might have a 914 if you have more seats than you can fit in your car.

You might have a 914 if the fixit repairs on your car are at least double the original cost.

You might have a 914 if friends are reluctant to have you "check out the suspension in their new NARP car.

Posted by: mattillac Nov 11 2004, 10:13 PM

Posted by: ClayPerrine Nov 12 2004, 08:48 AM

Sent the contents of this thread to my wife. Here are her additions:


You might own a 914 if when cleaning out your purse you actually think; "no, I need to leave that in just in case the car quits and I need something to fix it with".

You might own a 914 if you always hear a collective "Damn, not them again" from all the 911 drivers, every time you show up for an autocross.

You might own a 914 if you keep a running list of the different kinds of cars people have thought your car was (12 - MG's, 8 - Triumphs, 5 - Fiats, and one Lotus - yeah, I thought he was crazy too!).

You might own a 914 if when you move into a brand, new house you get the garage set up and organized long, LONG before you even start on the house.

Posted by: theol00 Nov 12 2004, 10:02 AM

You might own a 914 if you rather leave your 911 in the garage for your sunday drive....

You might own a 914 if you think 80 hp is plenty enough to go fast

Posted by: dralf Nov 12 2004, 10:15 AM

You might be a 914 owner if only the metric sockets in your tool box are dirty and worn.

Posted by: Dman Nov 12 2004, 11:52 AM

This is my favorite;

Your a 914 owner if you can synchronize carbs while standing on the seats pressing the accellerator.

But,
You might be a 914 owner if you put long underwear and gloves on before you go for a drive in what your wife refers to as the freezmobile.