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914World.com _ 914World Garage _ OT-914 Fantasy & Reality in my life

Posted by: Thomas J Bliznik Oct 14 2005, 08:17 PM

This is going to be a long one. Why did this happen to me. First I want to tell you how it should be.

914 Fantasy:
I have this recurring fantasy that crops up every time I return from a business trip. When I get home in this fantasy, the women who promised to love, honor and keep a candle burning in the window is waiting at the front door. She is wearing a simple little frock by Yves St. Laurent. There is a smile on her face and a glass of wine in her hand. "Hello my darling", she murmurs as I walk up the steps. "It's so wonderful to have you home again. Come in, sit down and let me rub your temples while I tell you about your rich uncle "Herbie" who you never met but died last week and left you a 0-milage original 914-6 GT. She leads me to my favorite chair in the living room. She brings me a glass of wine. I hope this Chateau Lafitte Rothschild isn't to imprudent, she says. I sip the wine slowly. It is a bit brusque, but I decide not to mention it. I'm not a picky person. After two or three glasses of wine, she brings the grandchildren into the room, one at a time.
each one smiles, hugs me then goes back to their room to play quietly for the rest of the day. The rest of the evening is spent in good wine, quiet conversation and occasional giggles. We wonder what color my new 914-6 GT will be??

Now for 914 Reality:
Last week for instance, I returned home from a long business trip. The women who promised to love, honor and burn my candle is not waiting for me at the door. The front door is locked. The keys are inside my suitcase. I have a choice of rummaging through a week's worth of dirty laundry or going to another door. I walk around to the side door. It's unlocked. I walk in, she is in the kitchen cleaning out the refrigerator. She is wearing a simple frock from K-Mart. There is grease smears on her forehead, bologna in her hand for supper sandwiches. Watch where your walk, she says. The dog just had another accident. Oh, and before you take your coat off, smell this bologna and tell me if you think it's rancid?? If it is you can take it out right now and throw it in the garbage. "Wait a minute". I've been gone a long time and isn't there anything you have to say besides "watch where you walk and smell the bologna?? Of course there is she said. Why didn't I think of it before. The Toilet's broken and the paper boy ran his bike into your 914. I pick my way through a floorful of empty pizza boxes, QVC boxes and cloths laying on the floor and head to the living room and my favorite chair. I discover it's occupied by my favorite dog woofie. I don't suppose you'd like me to sit in my chair I ask the dog. Woofie looks up at me, yawns and goes back to sleep. I sit on the couch. The women who promised to love, honor and trim my wick brings me a cup of tea. The last time I saw liquid that color, was a puddle under my 914,she explains. I didn't have time to go to the store while you were gone. Oh well it's hot. Eventually my grandchildren wander through the room. The 3-year old does not notice me. Tthe younger one runs a truck into my shins, Ouch!! They didn't know I was out of town. I finish my tea and go to fix the toilet. The dog greets me at the bathroom door and wants to lick my face with kisses. The dog then barfs up pieces of rubber parts. I discover he was chewing on the toilet plunger. Next I check my 914 and find the grandchildren played house in the 914 with their new paint set. Guess I will never win anothe rbest of show award. Gross.

Anyway that's my story for the week. It's been a rough one. Hope your week was better.

Tom

Posted by: grasshopper Oct 14 2005, 08:45 PM

wow that sucks

Posted by: rick 918-S Oct 14 2005, 08:47 PM

Wow!

When the dust settles....

Posted by: spiritedTreiber Oct 14 2005, 08:47 PM

So is the paper boy dead, or what?

I am still waiting for the insurance guy to get off his ass and tell me that my car is actually worth the $6K that it is and not $4K. Rough week here too. I miss driving the teener. Best wishes that next week is better.....

Posted by: Qarl Oct 14 2005, 08:52 PM

So when do we get to come over and torture the grandkids for messing with your 914?

Posted by: Gint Oct 14 2005, 09:32 PM

I'm really sorry Tom. But you brought a smile to my face.

My week wasn't much better. And the next two three are going to be worse. This is my last weekend off for 3 weeks. I plan to enjoy it.

I want to see pics orf the 914 carnage as well.

Posted by: airsix Oct 14 2005, 09:41 PM

QUOTE
Next I check my 914 and find the grandchildren played house in the 914 with their new paint set. Guess I will never win anothe rbest of show award. Gross.

I've come to expect as a matter of course that anything I don't put away under lock and key will be stolen, broken, vandalized, comondeared, "organized" , borrowed, donated, run without oil, overheated, returned without fuel, dented, scratched, thrown-up in, stained, jury-rigged, rained on & rusted, dulled and not resharpened, bent and not straightened, and last but not least I'll be told that it wasn't very good and I should have had a better one (for others to abuse/use/lose).

QUOTE
Anyway that's my story for the week. It's been a rough one. Hope your week was better.
Tom

I spent 3 hours today in a dental chair gagging on ground up pieces of my jaw bone. (impacted wisdom teeth that should have come out 15 years ago). Not as bad as finding the inside of my car painted though, so you have my sympathy.

-Ben M.

Posted by: Aaron Cox Oct 14 2005, 09:59 PM

that sooo sucks man.

Posted by: kwales Oct 14 2005, 10:03 PM

Click your heels together three times and say....

"There's no place like home....."

There's no place like home....."

There's no place like home....."

(Just be careful you don't knock the sequins off your ruby slippers)

Ken

Posted by: Thomas J Bliznik Oct 15 2005, 08:05 AM

Hi All,
Things are getting back to normal after our baby sitting fiasco. We love our children and grandchildren, but they take advantage of us. Here's an update.

Son-in-law & daughter came back from their R&R getaway looking sun tanned & happy. Daughter winked and said maybe you will have another grandchild to babysit sometime in the future (Oh boy can't wait). They took the boys and their dogs back home. The place is quiet. My wife is sleeping in this morning & I hear soft moans from the bedroom when she turns over from all those tired bones. She has a smile on her face so she must have enjoyed herself. The plumber was here yesterday to fix the toilet. Did you know his hourly billing rate is more than my attorney!! I am in the wrong business. Had the dent taken out by the "dent-Less" process from the paperboys bike hit. Came out perfect. Cleaned up the kids party mess inside the 914 with Goo-Gone. It's a wonderful product to clean up kids paint spills. Most of the damage was on the AA floor matts purchased from Geo Hussey. Thanks Geo & AA (did I say that). 914 is again perfect. Washed the 914 and took everyone for a ride (see pic). Can't wait to have them grow up so they can really enjoy my 914. For now it's Papa's yellow loud car. My daughter is a pharmacist (UofM Grad) and gave me a prescription for a pain killer if we need it. She know how to smooze us.

Just got a call from my son (Engr. w/Oil Company in Houston) telling me he just took an assignment in Libya (North Africa) to run his company's oil operations for two years. They will want us to baby sit when they get settled so they can go on their R&R vacation. So it looks like I'll be baby sitting half way around the world soon. Wait till my wife wakes up and finds out!!!

In conclusion, things are back to a normal 914 life. Next week were going to our Northern MI hideout on the lake. No kids, dogs and hide out for awhile.
Are we normal??? or do you lead a similiar life???

Tom

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Posted by: Gint Oct 15 2005, 08:08 AM

QUOTE (Thomas J Bliznik @ Oct 15 2005, 08:05 AM)
In conclusion, things are back to a normal 914 life. Next week were going to our Northern MI hideout on the lake. No kids, dogs and hide out for awhile.
Are we normal??? or do you lead a similiar life???

Tom

Absolutely!

Posted by: Howard Oct 15 2005, 11:12 AM

Tom, thanks for the great story, Grandpa. Sounds like a regular day around here
But this makes it all worthwhile. Call if you want to start a support group. Our family tries to keep the 'fun' in Dysfunctional.
Sam's Grandpa.

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Posted by: Thomas J Bliznik Oct 16 2005, 05:18 PM

Howard,

Wow, what a sweetie. You are one lucky grandpa.

Tom
BTW
Went to the 1-year olds birthday party yesterday. Don't get better that that. Spoil them & return home to rest up.

Posted by: redshift Oct 16 2005, 05:33 PM

If it isn't one thing, it's ten others.

Life..

M

Posted by: Eddie914 Oct 16 2005, 05:46 PM

I wish my kids's had a grampa like you!

Eddie