WAY OT: Engagement rings, Exploiting my personal life, yet again. Options

[ninefourteener]

Ok folks...... you're not gonna believe this one.

Been single over 3 years now.... Definately did my fair share of "experiencing" all the options out there. Been with my current g/f for 11 months.

My longest relationship in my life (excluding my miserable first marriage) was only 4 months.

I think I made this decision last week. I found out that I have "advanced degenerative arthritis" in my right hip, and at age 29, I have almost no cartillage left in my right hip. Anyway..... my g/f took care of me for over 2 days when I couldn't walk. She cried when my pain got bad, and basically stopped her life entirely to help me.

Oh yea.... and she LOVES the 914 (IMG:http://www.914world.com/bbs2/html/emoticons/biggrin.gif)

Can't think of anyone I'd rather spend the rest of my life with. She graduates from college in a few weeks, and will be a high-school history teacher. I want to pop the question on her graduation day.

QUESTION: Anyone recommend a good place to find an engagement ring? I'll need to finance it, so it'll have to be a reputable store that has a credit program.

..... Shaking in anticipation of the comments about to come--LOL

[Joe Bob]

Someplace where they also give brain scans.... (IMG:http://www.914world.com/bbs2/html/emoticons/blink.gif)

[SGB]

QUOTE

she LOVES the 914

(IMG:http://www.914world.com/bbs2/html/emoticons/smilie_pokal.gif)

[Bleyseng]

I just got one in Feb so look around for something you like together first. OR just buy something to give her that you can take back to surprise her when you ask the question.
Oh, try to be romantic and pick a good spot so you can both remember it fondly.
Don't spend a ton of money $$$$$, I spent $500. Don't believe those stupid ads, buy what you can afford. What's the point of going in debt big time???? Start off the relationship on good financial footing, later if she wants the big rock and you have lots of money buy it then.

[ninefourteener]

QUOTE ("Z" @ Apr 22 2005, 05:59 AM)

Someplace where they also give brain scans.... (IMG:http://www.914world.com/bbs2/html/emoticons/blink.gif)

LMFAO (IMG:http://www.914world.com/bbs2/html/emoticons/chairfall.gif)

[Tom Perso]

Ok, first off. Never post a picture of yourself and your good looking S/O on here. The vultures are circling. (IMG:http://www.914world.com/bbs2/html/emoticons/wink.gif)

And, they'll make stupid avitars of yourself. Just ask "Z" (IMG:http://www.914world.com/bbs2/html/emoticons/laugh.gif) (IMG:http://www.914world.com/bbs2/html/emoticons/laugh.gif)

I can't help you with financing a ring. When my wife and I were first talking about getting married and rings and such, she wanted something that was nice and didn't break the bank. She wanted us to save our money so we could buy a house before we were married. You can always get a better ring down the road (they make good anniversary presents).

But, get something that you both like... And of course, just picking out a ring together is the tip of the iceburg when it comes to decisions... (IMG:http://www.914world.com/bbs2/html/emoticons/smile.gif)

Anyways, congrats man! That is great news! You both look like a happy couple! Plus, if she likes the 914, she's a keeper!!

Later,
Tom

[ninefourteener]

QUOTE (Bleyseng @ Apr 22 2005, 06:03 AM)

I just got one in Feb so look around for something you like together first. OR just buy something to give her that you can take back to surprise her when you ask the question. Oh, try to be romantic and pick a good spot so you can both remember it fondly. Don't spend a ton of money $$$$$, I spent $500. Don't believe those stupid ads, buy what you can afford. What's the point of going in debt big time???? Start off the relationship on good financial footing, later if she wants the big rock and you have lots of money buy it then.

Well, she doesn't know I'm going to ask her.... thats part of the surprise. She's been pretty open about telling me she wants to.. so I'm not worried about her saying "no".. but I'd still like to surprise her.

As for the location..... that's why I picked her graduation.

As for the price.... I'd like to stay at around $1000.

I just have no idea where to start looking for one. My most expensive piece of jewelry is a sterling silver Armani Chain bracelet that I bought off ebay--LOL I'm kinda new at this.

[Tom Perso]

QUOTE (ninefourteener @ Apr 22 2005, 09:08 AM)

As for the location..... that's why I picked her graduation.

Nice idea!!!! There's no way she can resist!!!

Unless, you streak across graduation with a sign hangin around yer waist asking her to marry you.. LOL

Later,
Tom

[ninefourteener]

QUOTE (Tom Perso @ Apr 22 2005, 06:06 AM)

But, get something that you both like... And of course, just picking out a ring together is the tip of the iceburg when it comes to decisions... (IMG:http://www.914world.com/bbs2/html/emoticons/smile.gif) Anyways, congrats man! That is great news! You both look like a happy couple! Plus, if she likes the 914, she's a keeper!! Later, Tom

Trust me...... I know EXACTLY what she likes..... she's been pretty vocal about what she likes..... picking a ring is the easy part for me.

Picking a PLACE to buy the ring...... that won't rip me off is the hard part for me.

BTW... thanks (IMG:http://www.914world.com/bbs2/html/emoticons/beerchug.gif)

[PatW]

Marry her! You'll be glad you did. Just remember marrige is all work. The more you work at it, the more money she takes from your wallet. Oopss., Rant!. (IMG:http://www.914world.com/bbs2/html/emoticons/biggrin.gif)

Diamonds?. Try to stay away from the department stores. I found a little place ran by two brothers who let me spend hours in their shop until I decided what I wanted. Oh, and try to negotiate. Just because it says 500.00$ dosent mean they wont let it go for less. All together I think I spent around one thou.

Pat

[ArtechnikA]

QUOTE (ninefourteener @ Apr 22 2005, 08:57 AM)

Ok folks...... you're not gonna believe this one. I think I made this decision last week. I found out that I have "advanced degenerative arthritis" in my right hip... I want to pop the question on her graduation day. ...t'll have to be a reputable store that has a credit program.

why would we not believe it; most of us have BTDT, at least once.

my father had that, or a condition with similar symptoms anyway, 'aseptic necrosis.' he didn't deal with it well, but medical technology has come a long way and you're younger to start with. good luck with that

graduation day? ya think it won't be stressful enough? you're there and i'm not, but i wouldn't fixate on that date. with so many distractions, you might not get the answer you want. maybe let it scale down a day or two, and transition into the 'future plans' discussion. just MHO, you have to do what's going to be best in the situation. but you asked for my opinion, and that's mine.

reputable stores with financing will charge you the earth and 18% besides. do you HAVE TO have a ring to go with the question? (again, maybe you do.) we didn't. we just had very nice rings for the wedding; hers is a nice solitaire. then we did a set of anniversary rings last year, so she has a "matching set" although they didn't come at the "traditional" times. we saved our money and paid cash.

for a variety of reasons, we went here for both the wedding and anniversary rings. we like them. Titanium Era.

congratulations!

(here's another bit of basically unsolicited advice: don't rush anything)

[jasons]

QUOTE (ninefourteener @ Apr 22 2005, 06:08 AM)

As for the price.... I'd like to stay at around $1000.

$1k could be either challenging or easy. I don't think you will get a ton of options at that price range so that makes it easy. On the other hand you don't get a ton of options at that price range and that makes it hard. You will start seeing the bigger, nicer more $ stuff and you will want to give her that. With the amount of money I spent, I tell her she is wearing my next Porsche. I could have spent less and she would have been happy, but like Z said about the brainscan....

Checkout this site and get educated. Learn your 4 C's.

www.pricescope.com

Its all about diamonds and there is a good forum like this with people who know more about diamonds then you or me. They also have a search function for stones from online brokers. I bought my rock that way. It came with a GIA cert. and I had it checked out by a local gemologist. I picked out a setting locally and had them set my rock.

Diamonds are a dirty business from the mines to the retail stores.

Also Costco sells rings for decent prices. They are not GIA cert. but they are AGA I think.

Good luck and Congrats...

[ninefourteener]

QUOTE (PatW @ Apr 22 2005, 06:16 AM)

Marry her! You'll be glad you did. Just remember marrige is all work. The more you work at it, the more money she takes from your wallet. Oopss., Rant!. (IMG:http://www.914world.com/bbs2/html/emoticons/biggrin.gif) Diamonds?. Try to stay away from the department stores. I found a little place ran by two brothers who let me spend hours in their shop until I decided what I wanted. Oh, and try to negotiate. Just because it says 500.00$ dosent mean they wont let it go for less. All together I think I spent around one thou. Pat

Thanks Pat!!

Yea.. she's been living with me for nearly 5 months.. full time... so I know all about the $$$ thing---LOL

Thats ok though... she contributes just as much as I do, and she's pretty supportive of my car / guitar hobbies. I can't complain. She had to draw the line when I told her I wanted to pimp out the Acura with a TV in the dash.. but other than that.. she likes my car stuff--LOL

BTW..... I totally dig your coffee table... you're a lucky guy.. cause she'd NEVER allow that in our home--LOL

This weekend I'm going to check out a couple places in the local area.... "Jared's" and "the Shane Company"... I heard they are both pretty decent.. but I've never been to either one.

[ninefourteener]

QUOTE (ArtechnikA @ Apr 22 2005, 06:16 AM)

graduation day? ya think it won't be stressful enough? you're there and i'm not, but i wouldn't fixate on that date. with so many distractions, you might not get the answer you want. maybe let it scale down a day or two, and transition into the 'future plans' discussion. just MHO, you have to do what's going to be best in the situation. but you asked for my opinion, and that's mine.

Hey man... I appreciate the advice..... I really do.

You gotta figure though... she's been teaching (student teaching) for several months now, 5 days a week, with no pay at all. Then working all weekend long at a pharmacy to make $$. She's worked 7 days a week with no days off for months.

Her graduation is more of a "relief" than anything. Plus, it's kind of the start of a new life for her. I think she's looking fortward to it even more than your typical graduate.

I really do think its a great opportunity to make a good day, even better for her. She wants to get married, she tells me almost daily.. I'm not worried about her saying "no".

Thanks... I'm not rushing it though... I'm 100% certain about this (IMG:http://www.914world.com/bbs2/html/emoticons/beerchug.gif)

[chilli]

(IMG:http://www.914world.com/bbs2/html/emoticons/smilie_pokal.gif)
My thoughts, Start with something you can afford. Look at a good pawn shop that will give you in writing a description of what you are getting and a "retail" appraisal (insurnance backup). I am lucky as I have found a good shop here in sacramento. Shop around for something similiar in each store. I found a ring set that the wife loves for around $300-400. She is not into large stones so that helped.

Remember it is really not the ring, but it is what you are asking.

(IMG:http://www.914world.com/bbs2/html/emoticons/biggrin.gif) mike

[tat2dphreak]

I went through this just a couple of years ago...

first off, congrats, it really sounds like you have found somone special for yourself! glad she likes the teener!! (IMG:http://www.914world.com/bbs2/html/emoticons/smilie_pokal.gif)

when my wife and I started looking at rings together, we looked at expensive places, cheap places, online and stores, antique rings and new... I knew what my wife wanted, so all I had do was get it... (IMG:http://www.914world.com/bbs2/html/emoticons/wink.gif)
I, like you, didn't have the money saved up for a ring, and my wife would have killed me if I spent the traditional "2 months salary" BS...
buy what you can afford, don't go in debt for a ring(the wedding will do that for you),

fact is, you'll find that *most* women don't care about the ring , they care about the person giving it to them, whether you get it at Sam's(costco, wal-mart), or Tiffany's(or wherever else is $$$) and you can always get them a bigger, better ring later, when you can!

learn about the diamonds, certifications and appraisals... the 2 sites below will teach you a lot... one thing I believe though: the CUT portion of the 4 Cs is the most important, a good cut can make a SI diamond look great or make a "flawless" diamond look bad

as for "where" to get it:
bluenile.com
mondera.com

both get you a lot for your $$. not that they are cheap, but you get a little more value...

if you don't care about certified diamond right now, places like costo, sam's, sears can actually get you a pretty decent looking diamond for a lot less... but it's no longer the same investment that will be worth more money later... but as I already said, it will be worth the same to her! but, if you can, get it from a place with a good warranty, in case the diamond falls out, or the band gets messed up...

and I agree, try to negotiate with smaller places first!!

[ConeDodger]

I agree that the 1K price range can be challenging. Perhaps I could make a suggestion. There is a synthetic chemically and structurally identical stone called Moissonite. Search it on Google. A one carot stone with a good ring would be in the range of 1800 to 2000.

They do scratch glass, they are more perfect than real so by agreement with the diamond industry they have microingraving identifying them as Moissonite.

Do talk to her about it first. 10 years down the line when she is tired of your saggy butt sitting on the couch while she vacuums and she has the ring in for cleaning the jeweler might tell her it is Moissonite and it will be that last straw... Or not, she might be from another planet and just smile at your "economic ways".

Did that sound cynical???

Congratulations.... You will never be bored with a history teacher as a wife. As long as you know some history yourself...

Rob

[tat2dphreak]

QUOTE (chilli @ Apr 22 2005, 09:44 AM)

(IMG:http://www.914world.com/bbs2/html/emoticons/smilie_pokal.gif) My thoughts, Start with something you can afford. Look at a good pawn shop that will give you in writing a description of what you are getting and a "retail" appraisal (insurnance backup). I am lucky as I have found a good shop here in sacramento. Shop around for something similiar in each store. I found a ring set that the wife loves for around $300-400. She is not into large stones so that helped. Remember it is really not the ring, but it is what you are asking. (IMG:http://www.914world.com/bbs2/html/emoticons/biggrin.gif) mike

(IMG:http://www.914world.com/bbs2/html/emoticons/agree.gif)

my wife has small hands, and works in the medical field, big stones weren't even an option... that helped a LOT!!


one more thing... if your girl is like mine, they would prefer a random tuesday(whenever) to a day they already have a lot going on... if you want to do it around the same time as her graduation, fine, but keep it private, she will appreciate it more being a private, romantic moment

[ninefourteener]

QUOTE (tat2dphreak @ Apr 22 2005, 06:58 AM)

buy what you can afford, don't go in debt for a ring(the wedding will do that for you),

Actually... her and her family are pretty old-fashioned about that.

I'm lucky..... I buy the rings, and the tux.

Her family takes care of the wedding... cool huh?

She's been pretty vocal about what kind of ring she "would" like... you know..... "Should I ever decide to ask her"--LOL

She's not into gaudy (sp) jewelry.... simple, plain white gold band w/ 1/2 to 3/4 Carat, single stone, square cut. I don't think thats too bad, right?

Hell.. her mom has this MONSTER ring on her finger... I call it the "House". I think her dad payed like 9 grand for it. Thank God she's not into that... might have to re-think this whole thing--LOL

[Root_Werks]

Both my wife and I have very simple plain wedding bands. I think both ran us $150 for white gold? Something like that. We spent $1k on her engagement ring she wears the band and ring together. We have only been married just over a year now, life is good, very good. (IMG:http://www.914world.com/bbs2/html/emoticons/biggrin.gif)

I wouldn't overstretch your budget. We spent what we had the money for knowing there would be a wedding and honeymoon to follow. (IMG:http://www.914world.com/bbs2/html/emoticons/wink.gif)