WAY OT: Pysco ex girlfiend!, What would you do?? Has it ever happened to you? Options

[degreeoff]

Alright......#1 reason to not date a girl that attempted suicide


I have been trying to break it off with this girl for 2 months....she does not make it easy, calls, cry's, shows up @ house unannounced etc etc.

Started Friday night I have had it with her SHIT and break up via email...in person not working blah blah blah....she shows up once to hear it face to face, tell her I don't love her it isn't going to work....she leaves.....3 hours later (she lives 45 min away people!) she shows up again with a bag of scripts for sleeping and pops on in front of me.....I calm her down she spends the night we bump uglies (Hey I am a guy.....) BUT we are still broken up in the am. I tell her we can still talk (trying to be as nice as possible here).

Next day I have with my daughter (ex and I are VERY liberal with visitation, she is not to be around @ those times being unstable and all) end of the day I drop my daughter off with mom, come home and she calls......Do do Do do Do do....conversation goes south I can tell she has taken something and ask her she says "yes" else I would kill myself (she had been in the hospital once (so she says) for trying to kill herself)....I do a double take and start telling her how she can't do that because her family and friends care for her etc etc (her family is wacko too)....conversation still gets worse and she says "I cant take it....I am going to pop some pills" and hangs up......

Alright I like this 32 year old woman very little at this point BUT can't let her do that so call the cops in her town and tell them the story.....10 calls later they were at her house and inside (I knew where the spare key was) and they call to tell me that she is not there...BAM!! she knocks on my door AHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHH!!!! as I am talking to police dispatch she shows up...I told dispatch this and hung up...she came in bearing a dog in one hand and a toothbrush in the other (I told you she was hard to get rid of)...we start to talk she is drugged and upset I get another call from the dispatch saying I would have to call 911 if there were any other problems. We talked a few minutes before she started to loose her temper...

THEN it happens, I say " look you have to calm down or I will call the cops" thats all folks! she screamed "GO AHEAD!" "I'll make sure you never see your daughter AGAIN!" and starts to punch , kick, scratch etc etc and grabs me by my necklace (a big sucker) and won't let go screaming the whole time "HIT ME JOSH!!" now under these circumstances (shes about 150 lb 5'7" and strong) I would have loved to hit her but momma raised a good boy and I didn't but had to pin her with my knees and really WORK to get free!

Once free I immediately call 911 saying get some one here (addy) NOW!

THEN the UNTHINKABLE happens....she picks up my guitar case and starts hitting herself in the face with it say "you are hitting me josh!"

I then say to the cops "this crazy bitch is beating herself with my guitar case!! get here NOW!!!" and hang up

Now I am scratched, shirt torn, and wacked out from the adrenalin rush sitting in my kitchen as she went into the living room and laid on the couch. 5 min later the EMT's show up and go into get her make sure shes alright etc and she let them know that she is on ambien (as I did). Then the cops show up and the story get told they see I am all beat up and the EMT's took her to the hospital (she beat her lip up good with that guitar case!) I am talking with the police and express my concern over criminal charges and they say "we have not arrested you have we" and left it at that, then said you don't want to press charges do you ? you just want her out of your house right? and I am like (nice guy that I am) yeah.....so they sit around my place for a while shootin the shit, went out to the shop and we talked cars for a while (no shit)

Well they let her out of the hospital around 2am she shows up to get her car and her dog (I opened the door handed her the leash and shut the door) all over right? whew glad I can get some sleep.

Next day I get a summons for a restraining order and A 2nd DEGREE assault charge!! On advice of the sheriff I immediately go up to the commissioners office 9pm Sunday night and file for the same....

Wacko freak of a BITCH!! now I need a lawyer, more $$ (coulda used that on my car for cryin out LOUD!)

How do I prove her wrong? I want to sue and get her locked up!

Thanks for reading (it is ALL true I shit you NOT!)

Josh

[Allan]

I calm her down she spends the night we bump uglies (Hey I am a guy.....)

That's where it goes sideways.

I hope it works out, and you and your daughter stay safe, but if you're going to end a relationship, do it with no questions needing to be asked and walk away.

[crash914]

Dude,

I feel for you.. I had one of those before. moved out of state to get out of it all....

So if you got a restraining order, she should not be at your house right?

Get the cops to back up your story, you got all the 911 stuff...

Good luck, I will keep the car for you....(IMG:style_emoticons/default/wink.gif) Glad I am not single any more...

[degreeoff]

Seriously makes me rethink my last 6 year relationship.......You are right Allen the sex and breakup do not work...I tried that route numerous times before this with her though....restraining order will go into effect tomorrow after the hearing....

I really want her to hit jail though...we are talking about a FELONY here....thats bad news, Herb you met the crazy bitch that day you were here to pick up the tank...did she seem wacko?

[Phoenix914]

She didn't mess up your guitar, did she?

I used to be involved with a crazy, pill-poppin, suicidal psycho. She went away much more quietly, though. I think she got better too (somewhat). Sorry I can't help you with legal advice, but I do feel your pain. Good luck, Josh.

Bryan

[G e o r g e]

get a tape recorder, and be ready to tape incoming calls. if she is this whacked out she will call you back again and again. She'll prove your innocence. try and relax it will all work out

[crash914]

actually, she seemed pretty cool....dried the kids pants and all... cute too...From what you said, I thought that she was living there, that makes it hard to kick them out...

I just know that with me, they mostly left cause I am an ass...I guess you don't have that problem..(IMG:style_emoticons/default/sad.gif)

let me know if I can help...

[Rusty]

Wow... this reminds me of my younger days. I thought I found every really crazy skirt in my age bracket. Guess I missed one.

Good idea about taping the phone calls.

Get a web cam... point it towards your front door and turn it on anytime someone knocks.

[dflesburg]

but crazy sex is better than doing it alone...

[degreeoff]

Thanks guy's,

No the 68 Gibson is OK she did dent the case but its a cheap case....I'll learn to play it one day too.

I won't say I wasn't an ass....after she did a few things early on my attitude went from adoring to enduring then to cold uncaring....

she never lived with me just stayed often....I mean HDTV big hot tub fenced backyard for the dogs (my 2 + her 1) why not its a cool pad....

I will be OK I mean I am right and shes not....you cannot hide the truth forever + I have 1 taped mess. she left where she flipped crying etc, another where she admits to popin a pill and a third that say's she cant handle it and is coming over (from a day-a week before the event)

My therapist said to me once that we attract those as sick as ourself...but come on......

As for the camera I have a camcorder ready and waiting......

I actually mopped the shop and did a full clean (welding the trailing arm reinforcement brackets made a MESS) now I will immerse myself in some hod pin installation for wind down time

[lotus_65]

i had one of those, worse in some ways. she sounds bipolar, like my ex.
my nightmare went on for years, and included very awful things that no one should be exposed to.
do you have contact with her folks? i would tell them what happened and ask them to help you get her help.

she needs a psych eval if she's popping pills and beating herself up. if she's committed, she'll get the help/meds she needs. gl, and pm me your phone # if you want to talk about it.

paul

[GTPatrick]

Dude,

I kinda know what you are going thru . My divorce was kinda like that about the psycho bitch gig .

One word of advice, STAY THE HELL AWAY FROM THAT PSYCHO BITCH ! ! ! ! No more horizontal bopping for you bro. The laws are set up to protect women and not men. The law/cops/courts look at men as half as good and twice as bad. Most women/biatches will use the law to prosecute your ass and put you away even though they are lying. She hit herself with the guitar case to try to prove that you started it by hitting you and the yelling " . . . stop hitting me . . . ." so that the cops could hear this shit going on.

Since she picked up/touched that guitar case, don't touch it or clean it cuz her finger prints are on it and couold be used as evidence against her. While it is still fresh in your mind write down a timetable as to what happened and what each party said. Time of your calls to the cops, 911, emts, etc. That will be taped calls that can help you. Tape every phone call that you get from her . Depending on the law in your state you may be prevented from doing so without her knowledge/consent so tell her from the very beginning that all calls she makes to you will be recorded . Do so to protect yourself legally.

Where there any witnesses in your subdivision or apartment complex where you lived who saw all of this shit go down ??? If so ask around and get their names as potential witnesses when you go to ccourt because you will wind up there.

Also watch out that she doesn't falsely accuse you of rape because I have have some buds of mine had that done to them.

From now on, keep a paper trail of notes of what goes on to protect yourself. When ever you go somewhere keep track of that so if she accuses you of anything in the future you can prove when , where you were to protect your self.

The idea of having a video cam ready so to tape anytime she comes to your hacienda is a damn good idea. DO NOT OPEN THE DOOR to her under any circumstances. Talk thru the door and tell her to get the hell away from you. And call the cops/911 before you even go close to the door.

You must do every thing in your power to protect yourself and following your attorney's advice is the first step. That psycho bitch can make your life miserable just for the sake of female/bitch revenge. There is no logic in this but that's the way some women are.

Good luck dude in taking care of yourself and if you can please keep us posted of what's going on , that's if your attorney will allow it. (IMG:style_emoticons/default/aktion035.gif)

[GTPatrick]

i had one of those, worse in some ways. she sounds bipolar, like my ex.
my nightmare went on for years, and included very awful things that no one should be exposed to.
do you have contact with her folks? i would tell them what happened and ask them to help you get her help.

she needs a psych eval if she's popping pills and beating herself up. if she's committed, she'll get the help/meds she needs. gl, and pm me your phone # if you want to talk about it.

paul

Dude,

Me again, I disagree with the above idea of contacting her parents. They may be as f***** up as she is and may take it as a way of stalking her and will lie about what you said . STAY AWAY from her parents too because blood is thicker than water and families tend to circle the wagon aound them and their agrieved offspring when they are in trouble . They will look upon you as the bad guy. And if they are smart enuf already , well they already know that their daughter is a psycho bitch anyways.

This could be used against you by them falsely accusing you of harassing them too ! ! ! ! JUst cut /sever all realtions and communications with her , her family and any of her other friends or relatives. Make a clean brake or it will come back and haunt you in one way or another.

Watch your 6 at all times bro .

[degreeoff]

Yeah, I am with the leave the family out of it....NOT MY PROBLEM any longer, if the event hadn't happened I might have called her dad but the shit that went down ....forget it!! I will get an atty tomorrow....1st logical step, and believe you me I will be watching behind me and carrying a bat in the car too!

Tomorrow @ 10 am is the restraining order hearing, the 26th of march is the first assault hearing...I'll keep you all posted.

thanks guys

Josh

BTW she is a Welbutrin bipolar nut....

[Mark Henry]

Forget the bat and keep your cell phone handy with 911 on speed dial.

You don't need to give her any ammo with a concealed weapon charge against you.

If she goes anywhere near you or yours call the cops ASAP.

[byndbad914]

talked to my buddy that is a cop in LA about this kinda stuff before when I went to a spousal abuse call with him and the GF was clearly pulling this exact stuff! He ended up arresting her (IMG:style_emoticons/default/clap56.gif)

So this is general and of course laws around you may change, but his thing is most courts will see through the BS she will claim about you hitting her but that is no guarantee. What is your best bet is get the restraining order and whenever she shows up, don't even bother talking with her first - call the cops and get them on their way. Then if you can talk to her through the door and tell her to leave - don't argue with her just keep telling her to leave. Don't necessarily mention you called the cops tho' - if your cops have a decent response to this, they will show up and she will still be there and not too much embarassing shit will go down. then have her hauled away in cuffs and take all legal action against her with the restraining order. spending a little time in cuffs and jail may change her attitude real quickly. And she will be bawling just about the time they get the cuffs good and tight.

Do not open the door, do not confront her or give her any ammo whatsoever against you as another guy stated - use the restraining order and press charges. Jail has a way of straightening a bitch out, and she may not be right in the head but she will learn to stay away after a couple arrests. And of course is she persists in breaking the order she will do serious time. Then you have worries at all!

Then my opinion after that is F her - if she goes home and swallows pills and kills herself after all that, well that is her damn fault and you shouldn't let that bother you one single bit. Adults make their own decision and pay their own consequences - just like you are suffering for getting some when you should've severed it clean (IMG:style_emoticons/default/biggrin.gif)

[Bleyseng]

BTDT- if she takes pills and such its not your problem.

If she shows up, dial 911 and say she is threatening you that she has a gun.

[draperjojo]

I'll store the 68 Gibson for you until you're sure its safe..... (IMG:style_emoticons/default/smile.gif) How about a nice Tazer, they have some that look like cell phones, and some that go up to almost 1,000,000 volts......that would put 150lbs on the ground and drooling long enough for you to get away and the cops to arrive.

[So.Cal.914]

I think one or two crazy GF's is a right of passage for guys. All of my friends

(Yes I do have friends) have complained one time or another about this very

thing. I for one liked the crazy ones...they have the best pills.

The tazer sounds fun but if she has been abuseing drugs her heart could be

funky and she could die right on your porch, so don't forget to drag her inside.

[Bleyseng]

from Slate..

Dear Prudence,
I was married a year and a half ago, after a probably too-brief courtship, to a woman who soon after the wedding was diagnosed as bipolar. I later discovered she had a previous history of mental illness that she had concealed from me. I feel as if I'm living with an emotional terrorist—I never know where or when the next bomb is going to go off. She is now on medication and things have gotten better, but better still isn't good. Intimacy, partnership, and equality are no longer real possibilities. We haven't slept in the same bed for over a year. Yes, we've tried counseling, and no, nothing improved. My wife is also financially irresponsible and routinely bounces checks. I discovered that she had tens of thousands of dollars in defaulted debt. I know that anyone reading this letter is going to say, "It's been less than two years, you were lied to, get out while you're still sane." But I feel tremendously guilty over the idea of abandoning someone who is mentally ill, and who in all likelihood could not survive on her own financially. Yet I also feel that I can't live the rest of my life trapped like this. I just need an impartial voice to tell me that if I end it, I'm not going to be condemned to hell for needing to move on in order to survive. If you're that voice, please speak up now. If you think I'm evading my responsibilities, please let me know.

—Torn

Dear Torn,
You're not going to be condemned to hell—you're already there. Bipolar disorder is a terrible illness, though fortunately it can be treated and controlled. But your wife sounds as if she's a long way from stability, if she will ever get there. At the least, she was obligated to disclose her mental and financial history to you. She didn't, so your marriage began in deceit. You say your survival is at stake here, so the question is not staying or going—it's how you go while doing the least damage to a woman you cared for enough to marry. You should discuss with both a therapist and a lawyer your desire to help her make the transition back to being on her own. And while you're talking to that therapist, try to figure out how you entered into a marriage with a virtual stranger.

—Prudie