G & R All 914 Rusty Parts Swap Meet and Animal Flesh Roasting Fesi, I had a brain fart and can't find the original thread Options

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Ok, Ladies and Germs, on APRIL 26TH we will have the reincarnation of the event of the year .... The one and only G&R All 914 Rusty Parts Swap Meet and Animal Fleshing Roasting Festival (no veeegans here).

Location: Back lot at 2727 Kansas Ave, Riverside, CA., 92507

Time: I will open the back gate at approximatley 6:30 AM.

You are free to spread your rust amongst my rust, but if they have relations you are responsible for the offspring. There is no charge for swap spaces. I will charge for losing my tools and parts you take off my cars while I am not looking.

Should you not sell any of your rusty crap, I will designate an area that you can dump it in and it will find it's way to the shredder.

If your car is low (Ricky Racer style), please enter at the left most part of the opening ..SLOWLY. For those of you that are dyslexic, this means with your back to the gate, enter on the right. While I am sure you wanted to drop your engine at some point, I do not want it to be dropped at our gate unless it is something above a 2.7L flat six.

All Porsches are welcome and NARP vehicles too! However, if it is an assdragger it will be designated a "parts car" and I will not be responsible for what happens after that.

Some of the notables attending this "one of a kind event" will be:

Glenn Sager ..."There is never a project I will ever finish"
Slits ... "Don't ask"
Professor 914 ... "Screw the King; I am Der Furher"
Toast ... Some of the lovliest floral and fauna in the desert. Offical "Coffee Girl".
Uncle Jimmy ... Local proponent for the PCA who shall be cast out the gate immediately.
The Right Reverend Mr. Meier ... For those of you that miss Sunday Services he will be on hand to service you all.

While many others have gone unmentioned and are to numerous to list, several are being released from the Grey Bar Hotel to attend this event. Please treat them accordingly.

The G&R All 914 Rusty Parts Swap Meet and Animal Flesh Roasting Festival abides by all laws that make sense to us, otherwise you are free to be as foolish as you chose. We are an equal opportunty non-organization and do not engage in racial red-lining unless you drive a Honda, Mazda, or any English car.

While most everything is free, we do ask for a $5.00 donation if you wish to partake of the animal flesh and condiments. Pepto Dismal and other gastro-intestinal condiments will not be available so partake at your own risk. There is one UNI-SEX bathroom, so be prepared to wait for our female guests. Relieving yourself in the parking lot may be appreciated by your SO, but it causes other's parts to rust more quickly and frankly, your tool does not impress anyone.

Now, if you don't have a GPS or a collection of maps it's to damn bad 'cause I ain't gonna type route instructions in this post. You will have to wait for another time (translated = when I damn well feel like it).

I will post phone numbers later in case you get lost. However, G&R, Inc., is not responsible for incorrect information if you don't know where in the hell you are when you call. Actually, we will not be responsible for anything that may or may not occur.

So there you have it. Come one, come all. Glenn and I hope you make this the enjoyable event it always has been.

Our commissions on your sales will be collected prior to you making any sales. This way we know you are not procastinating about not selling anything (Yes Thomas, that means you).

OH BTW, King George and President Obama declined our invitation so don't be disappointed.

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Some directions:

From LV ... I-15 to the 215/15 split near San Bernardino. Take I-215 thru San Berdo, past I-10. As you enter Riverside, take the 60 west and get off at the first off ramp. I believe the sign says "Main Street" but the first stop sign is Orange. Make a left .... go to the second stop sign "Spruce" and turn left. Go thru the residential area (2 stop signs) and up over the 91 FRWY (2 signals). Look immediately to your right after the second signal and crossing the RR Tracks. A sign should say Kansas Ave. Turn right, at the stop sign turn right again. At the next stop sign turn Left ... you are on Kansas at our front gate ... continue down Kansas till you see the open gate on your right.

From Palm Springs, AZ, etc .... I-10 or I-60 West (they split in Beaumont). If -10 continue to the 215 and turn South towards the Beaches and follow the above directions. If you come in the 60, it will join I-215 in Moreno Valley ... come down the hill, past UCR to the Blaine/3rd Street exit. Get off and turn left (3rd Street). Come down approximately 2 signals (Kansas Ave) and turn right (Howard's Liquor is on the Left hand far corner and Budget Transmission is on the far Right Corner). Cross the RR tracks and look immediately to your left for the open gate.

From the Beach: 91 Frwy to Riverside .... just before the 60 Frwy you will see "Spruce Street" Exit. Get off and at the signal (on top of the bridge) turn right. Go thru the next signal, cross the RR tracks and follow the instuction to go around the Howard Industries Building (shown in the first paragraph)

For those of you coming from up North or the SF Valley.. You can follow the 10, 60 or 210 out. If the 210 follow the instructions for LV ... come down the 215, etc. If the 10 .... do the same, take the 215 South. If you decide to jump the 15 to the 60, you can do that too. If you come in the 60, get off on Main Street, turn right and go to the first signal (Spruce Street) and follow the directions given for LV once you are on Spruce.

If these directions are confusing ... we have phone numbers posted.