G & R All 914 Rusty Parts Swap Meet and Animal Flesh Roasting Fesi, I had a brain fart and can't find the original thread Options

[SLITS]

Ok, Ladies and Germs, on APRIL 26TH we will have the reincarnation of the event of the year .... The one and only G&R All 914 Rusty Parts Swap Meet and Animal Fleshing Roasting Festival (no veeegans here).

Location: Back lot at 2727 Kansas Ave, Riverside, CA., 92507

Time: I will open the back gate at approximatley 6:30 AM.

You are free to spread your rust amongst my rust, but if they have relations you are responsible for the offspring. There is no charge for swap spaces. I will charge for losing my tools and parts you take off my cars while I am not looking.

Should you not sell any of your rusty crap, I will designate an area that you can dump it in and it will find it's way to the shredder.

If your car is low (Ricky Racer style), please enter at the left most part of the opening ..SLOWLY. For those of you that are dyslexic, this means with your back to the gate, enter on the right. While I am sure you wanted to drop your engine at some point, I do not want it to be dropped at our gate unless it is something above a 2.7L flat six.

All Porsches are welcome and NARP vehicles too! However, if it is an assdragger it will be designated a "parts car" and I will not be responsible for what happens after that.

Some of the notables attending this "one of a kind event" will be:

Glenn Sager ..."There is never a project I will ever finish"
Slits ... "Don't ask"
Professor 914 ... "Screw the King; I am Der Furher"
Toast ... Some of the lovliest floral and fauna in the desert. Offical "Coffee Girl".
Uncle Jimmy ... Local proponent for the PCA who shall be cast out the gate immediately.
The Right Reverend Mr. Meier ... For those of you that miss Sunday Services he will be on hand to service you all.

While many others have gone unmentioned and are to numerous to list, several are being released from the Grey Bar Hotel to attend this event. Please treat them accordingly.

The G&R All 914 Rusty Parts Swap Meet and Animal Flesh Roasting Festival abides by all laws that make sense to us, otherwise you are free to be as foolish as you chose. We are an equal opportunty non-organization and do not engage in racial red-lining unless you drive a Honda, Mazda, or any English car.

While most everything is free, we do ask for a $5.00 donation if you wish to partake of the animal flesh and condiments. Pepto Dismal and other gastro-intestinal condiments will not be available so partake at your own risk. There is one UNI-SEX bathroom, so be prepared to wait for our female guests. Relieving yourself in the parking lot may be appreciated by your SO, but it causes other's parts to rust more quickly and frankly, your tool does not impress anyone.

Now, if you don't have a GPS or a collection of maps it's to damn bad 'cause I ain't gonna type route instructions in this post. You will have to wait for another time (translated = when I damn well feel like it).

I will post phone numbers later in case you get lost. However, G&R, Inc., is not responsible for incorrect information if you don't know where in the hell you are when you call. Actually, we will not be responsible for anything that may or may not occur.

So there you have it. Come one, come all. Glenn and I hope you make this the enjoyable event it always has been.

Our commissions on your sales will be collected prior to you making any sales. This way we know you are not procastinating about not selling anything (Yes Thomas, that means you).

OH BTW, King George and President Obama declined our invitation so don't be disappointed.

[jim_hoyland]

Vegas Racer and Toast...