Ridiculous 914 stories?, You haven't lived if you have never... Options

[Andyrew]

Even so we tried to drive it around the block and the accelerator cable was looped around the clutch so every time you pushed the clutch in it opened the throttle.

I had this happen to me twice... Once on the front straight on streets of willow and once with a girl in the car in a residential area.

The throttle cable linkage would catch on the clutch linkage since it was an inch further forward.

[Chris H.]

A parts car I picked up many years ago had the front trunk release cable cut cleanly in half. Thought I was pretty smart getting into it from behind the front bumper...until the lid swung open and the bees came out. They were pretty angry. That was the last one I ever bought come to think of it (IMG:style_emoticons/default/idea.gif) .

[orthobiz]

When I'd get stuck in the snow, I'd put it in first gear, open the door, push and hop in when it started go go going.

Paul

[r_towle]

broke my accelerator cable at the autox, a site that has chain link fencing around it so if you leave the car, you cant get back inside later on...like when you get back with a trailer.

Tied the throttle body off so the motor was at about 3500 rpms and drove it home about 15 miles.

Loud at the intersections, but worked fine with quick short shifts and picking the right gear.

rich

[00r101]

Bought a 73 1.7 in '79. About '82 I'm driving with my girlfriend to a bar in the back country. We're having a mild argument about ??? The car has been acting up, threatening to stall whenever I get off the throttle. It's fall and rainy and there are lots of wet leaves. I am really going slow on this twisty road and everytime I lift the throttle I declutch and rev it to keep it going. After about 10 minutes of this we come to a little 90 degree turn at the top of a rise. When I declutch we go into a very slow lift throttle oversteer spin. Good old 914 low polar moment of inertia results in a pirouette 540. All going about 5mph. We spin into a little ditch. The car tips up on its side but is luckily stopped from rolling over by a wooden fence post. The car rolls back on its wheels and we stop. The first words out of my mouth, "are you ok?" Just then the farmer pulls up on his tractor yanks the car out of the ditch and refuses my offer of money for the tow or the fence damage. Talk about lucky. But the real luck was when we got back in the car. I got a big smootch and the argument is over. Why? "The first words out of your mouth was asking if I was ok" "You cared more about me then that damn car"

[speed metal army]

Drove across the line to buy my first 914. Drove about 6 hours, made the deal, hit the road! (Loaded on a trailer)Made it just into WA state and my truck and my new car got hit by a spinning GMC Jimmy on I-5. Hilarious. (IMG:style_emoticons/default/bs.gif) Wrecked before I got home.

(IMG:style_emoticons/default/huh.gif) I was hoping more for funny, but that's just depressing...

It turned out just fine. There was one funny thing..
At that time one of my favorite sayings to annoy my buddy Andrew was, "I need adventure!"
Andrew drove down with me that ill fated day. We stood on the side of the I5 as I stared at my poor car. We were silent for about a minute or so and he slapped his hand on my shoulder and said," Well, you said you needed adventure!"
I was going to kill him right there, but all we could do was laugh our asses off. (IMG:style_emoticons/default/biggrin.gif)

[VaccaRabite]

In 2010 or maybe 2009. Started the 914 for the first time that spring. It started shooting charred sunflower seeds out the exhaust pipe.

Chipmunks had put a cache of seeds in the muffler, that had then gotten ceramic coated and installed on my car.

It was funny as hell to see my car shooting seeds.

Zach

[Moneypit]

In 2010 or maybe 2009. Started the 914 for the first time that spring. It started shooting charred sunflower seeds out the exhaust pipe.

Chipmunks had put a cache of seeds in the muffler, that had then gotten ceramic coated and installed on my car.

It was funny as hell to see my car shooting seeds.

Zach

When my folks got married, my dad had a Tangerine '72 1.7 with the vinyl sail trim and the 356 style round hubcaps. In prepping their car for their departure at the wedding, their friends filled the car with rice. FILLED. The blowers kept shooting rice randomly out for YEARS.

Also, during their honeymoon, his friends thought it would be just so funny to leave an open tin of sardines under his seat while the car sat at the airport. Unfortunately, they didn't actually pick up the car from the airport, his mother did. After it had been baking in the west Texas sun for a week or so... (IMG:style_emoticons/default/barf.gif)

[northern chris]

A few years back we took the 914 on week-end trek from Edmonton, Alberta down to Waterton/Glacier National Park in Southern Alberta and Northern Montana (a nice half day drive). Anyway, one of the nice drives there is the "Going to the Sun" road over Logan's Pass, we left the mountain hotel fairly early and drove the nice twisty road over the pass and then it started to rain so we decide to proceed to Kalispell just to look around. Just a few miles before Kalispell there is a loud bang and the front passenger side of the car drops down to the stops. It takes about 10 seconds to realise we have just experienced a broken front torsion bar. Knowing we are many days from finding a replacement part, I swing the car around and we start to drive slowly towards home. I now know you can drive with a broken torsion bar as long as your tire life will allow, I started out with practically new tires on the front and ended up with a very bad spare by the time we made it back home. We had a relaxing time but it was tough that we couldn't really enjoy the return trip on the nice mountain roads. Now I carry a spare set of torsion bars in the tool box that lives in my 914.

[patssle]

I bought a nearly rust free 914 for just $4000 just 5 years ago. That's ridiculous!

[Trekkor]

Having to crawl under the 914 to jump the starter solenoid with a screwdriver to get to my own wedding.

Then getting a ride home after the reception because it wouldn't start.

(IMG:http://www.914world.com/bbs2/uploads_offsite/scontent-b.xx.fbcdn.net-1413-1398631921.1.jpg)

This post has been edited by Trekkor: Apr 27 2014, 02:52 PM

[buck toenges]

1# my dad brought home a 1970 914 in 1970. I was in 6th grade and was sick while my dad took all of the kids rides in the new car. I marveled at the hidden lights, 3 lids that could be opened up, engine in the middle, and 3 seat belts. Dad said it had a computer to make it run.

2# my folks were out in Ca. for a meeting when I was a sophomore in high school 1974. I decided to go to McDonald's for a hamburger and drive. Unfortunately the van parked next to me pulled out without seeing me and his front bumper caught my rear wheel opening and tore off my rear fender. Not good to have dad come back and see his car all ripped up.

3# driving same car down in Huston Texas for a co-op job in college in 1978. Had that crappy old vapor lock problem from the 1970 914 fuel pump location. I had to jump start my own car by pushing it down the road and popping the clutch. I did bring back 19 cases of Coors beer back to college that fall!

4# Just graduated from college in June of 1980. July 15th I was driving down the street from work and started smelling burnt rubber. stopped the car and looked at the rear passenger tire. The rear suspension broke off and was sitting sideways.

As you can see I experienced the life and death of a Porsche 914 from 6th grade to college graduate.

[JeffBowlsby]

The so-called 1974 914 LE "Grasshopper" is a ridiculous story. (IMG:style_emoticons/default/wink.gif)

[oakdalecurtis]

The 1st summer I had my 914 1.7, low mileage but 10 yrs old in '83.
I was creeping along in the middle lane of a freeway during rush hr heading home from work.
When the car, also barely moving, in the lane to my right rolls down his window and yells,

"You're car is spraying liquid on the ground and it sells like gas !!!"

He let me pull in front of him to the curb. The plastic fuel line had split almost in half !!
No fire (IMG:style_emoticons/default/biggrin.gif) I still owe that guy a huge thanks !

try this similar story:
As a newly elected Councilman in a small rural central California city, I was asked by to bring my '76 teener to drive in the annual city Christmas parade through town. I pulled into the parade line and began slowly idling down the main street route with another Councilman in the passenger seat. We hadn't gone far when a man on the sidewalk approached the side of our little yellow ride and told us we were "leaking water under the car real bad". That's an interesting comment since there is no water onboard a 914 to leak! I opened my door and leaned out to look under the car, only to see gasoline spraying down mid tunnel and rapidly pooling under the car! I quickly told my Council colleague to get out of the car fast! Then I franticly waved to onlookers to create an opening among the sidewalk crowd of people, and drove the still running 914 into a dirt field and shut it off. I left a trail of gasoline on the ground behind the car at least a foot wide as I went toward the field.
After having my 914 towed to my mechanic, as you probably already guessed, the fuel line, under pressure from tank in front to the engine in the rear, decided to split after 30 years, at that opportune moment during the parade. I had the fuel line repaired and all was fine.
I was invited to the city Christmas parade again the following year. When I pulled up in my teener to get in the parade line this time, my Council colleagues were standing nearby on the curb with lighters, flicking them repeatedly and saying they were "ready for me this year!" That's how you know who your friends are in politics!!!!

[Maltese Falcon]

Very stoked to be enjoying my first 2.7/six conversion in 1978, had the pleasure of a gent in a 240z pull up next to me at a light (real busy/ L.A. city intetsection). He says let's have a go at it when the light turns green; I say is this for a $50 spot...he says no " How about pink slips ". I answered that I already had a garage full of Z cars...we both had a good laugh (IMG:style_emoticons/default/biggrin.gif)

[914forme]

I have 4 finds of oddities in 914s.

Number 1:

My fathers 914-6 we found half a beach and a bunch of (IMG:style_emoticons/default/smoke.gif) in the cabin. Seems the previous owner liked to get all (IMG:style_emoticons/default/smoke.gif) and use it as a chick magnet and park it on a sandy beach.

Number 2:

Tearing down a parts car, I found a rotted fish behind the back pad. Guessing the guy pissed someone off. Though it could have been a flood car as I also fond the 1.7L was full of sand, and ants had built a nest inside.

Number 3:
Picked up a rusted out parts car, went to cut it up ,and whirl sewing it in half I ground to a halt with my metal blade in my (IMG:style_emoticons/default/sawzall-smiley.gif) . Come to find out, some one had taken a pressure treated 4x4 and drove it into the logs. Keep the car from folding in half.

Number 4:
Brought home another parts car to find that it did not sag, though the logs where rusted to crap. I could reach into the car from the outside. Figured out why when I started cutting it up. Some one had access to plate steel, and welded it across the floor boards. 1/4" Steel plate will keep your 914 from folding in half. A huge plate of it to cover the 914s floor from front to back weighs over 300 pounds. It made a nice piece for a welding table in my buddies shop.

[d914]

Drove to Roebling Road for a DE got in late about 9ish.. Pulled in next to my buddies Winnebago . Ramps down, straps off.. Buddy ( lewis) comes out and says "nah, do that in the morning.. Go to the hotel"..

Full agreement, so I start cranking to take the trailer off the truck with my son and Lewis standing shoulder to shoulder as on the last crank the 914 decides to leave the trailer, run over the cyclone fence and roll into the runoff area of the track....

Lewis turns and says " not in gear ugh???"

[Millerwelds]

I bought a nearly rust free 914 for just $4000 just 5 years ago. That's ridiculous!

I paid $2500 for mine about 6 years ago. She has been a daily driver since for the most part. (IMG:style_emoticons/default/beerchug.gif)

[Jeffs9146]

Back in the early 80's I had a 73 2.0L that I had to leave out at my parents ranch for a year while I focused on my new job. When I decided to pick it up I drove it from Aptos, CA to Salinas on my way to Monterey with the top down and the stereo blasting. About 1 mile from Laguna Seca Race Way (IMG:style_emoticons/default/driving.gif) my stereo lost reception on all channels, just static. I pulled over at the small gas station and opened the trunk to check the antenna, maybe it pulled out or something, I thought to my self. I traced the antenna wire down into the steering area and pull it out, it is cut clean through!???? (IMG:style_emoticons/default/idea.gif) I climb under the car with a flashlight and shine it into the steering box to see the largest Norwegian Brown Rat looking back at me! (IMG:style_emoticons/default/blink.gif) Now what??

I asked the guy at the gas station if he had anything to help me get it out. He got a can of carb cleaner and a 5 gallon bucket and we managed to catch it. (IMG:style_emoticons/default/beerchug.gif) I said thanks, wired my antenna back up, started the car to leave, and the guy at the gas station jumps in front of my car, YOU CAN'T LEAVE THAT HERE!! (IMG:style_emoticons/default/hissyfit.gif) I ask what should I do with it??? (IMG:style_emoticons/default/confused24.gif) After a short conversation we decide that the SPCA has an office across the street from the track. (IMG:style_emoticons/default/driving.gif) I drive up and take the bucket into the SPCA. They say "perfect timing, we were just about to feed the hawks" (IMG:style_emoticons/default/WTF.gif) . They open the cage, dump the 3 pound rat out and we watch as the hawks take care of the problem!! (IMG:style_emoticons/default/shades.gif)

That's my story!!

[oakdalecurtis]

Here's another "I can't believe it's true!" (but it is) 914 story. I was traveling out of Modesto on the the main drag, McHenry Boulevard, at about 11 pm on a Saturday night. My 16 year old son was also driving next to my yellow 914 in his new little black Toyota pickup. He was in the curbside lane, and I was in my topless teener in the center lane. As there was no other traffic, we were going side by side at about 60 mph, when a Modesto Police cruiser pulls up to McHenry from a side street on the right, about 200 feet ahead of us. My son braked fast enough to make the right turn next the the officer's cruiser and head away down the side street. Of course I sailed by right in front of the cop in the center lane, unable to do anything. I could see the officer's rooftop lights come on like a Christmas tree in my mirror. I could also see my son traveling away toward home on the side street, waving at me with a satisfied smile on his face. I pulled over under the illumination of the car dealerships on upper McHenry Boulevard. Then I shut off the 2 liter engine of my '76 teener, put my hands on the top the the yellow Momo steering wheel and waited patiently for my inevitable speeding ticket. The officer pulled up behind me, flashing lights ablaze, got out of his car, and slowly walked up beside my knee high 914. I waited for a moment to make eye contact with him, but I could tell out of the corner of my eye that he was eyeballing my street legal go cart with a grin. When we finally actually looked at each other, I'll never forget his EXACT and ONLY nine words: "Just looking for kids Sir, have a nice evening." THAT'S IT! He turned and walked slowly away as I tried to mumble "Thank you officer". He did not ask me for my license, papers, or any questions at all, just that nine word sentence, and then he was gone! When I got home and told my son what had happened, he was pissed, saying the cops would have given HIM a ticket. I said darn straight they would have! A few gray hairs and an eye candy car can go a long way to ease the path of life!