stupid engine jokes, really stupid... |
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stupid engine jokes, really stupid... |
boxsterfan |
Oct 22 2014, 10:58 PM
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#1
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914's are kewl Group: Members Posts: 1,776 Joined: 6-June 03 From: San Ramon, CA Member No.: 791 Region Association: Northern California |
What did the spark plug say to the coil when it received its first jolt?
Ohm my god!! Carry on.... |
messix |
Oct 22 2014, 11:09 PM
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#2
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AKA "CLUTCH KILLER"! Group: Members Posts: 6,995 Joined: 14-April 05 From: between shit kickers and pinky lifters/ puget sound wa.north of Seattle south of Canada Member No.: 3,931 Region Association: Pacific Northwest |
what did the 427 chevy say to the 427 ford ..... you sohc
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02loftsmoor |
Oct 22 2014, 11:34 PM
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#3
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Senior Member Group: Members Posts: 577 Joined: 26-June 11 From: Ft. Worth TX Member No.: 13,243 Region Association: Southwest Region |
you guys are killing me
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struckn |
Oct 23 2014, 06:52 PM
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#4
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Senior Member Group: Members Posts: 1,069 Joined: 9-November 11 From: South Central York Pennsyvania Member No.: 13,764 Region Association: MidAtlantic Region |
914 said " I'm a Boxer BAM BAM BAM BAM". Harley replied " I'm a V Twin " POTATO POTATO POTATO POTATO........
(IMG:style_emoticons/default/av-943.gif) |
Mike Bellis |
Oct 23 2014, 08:00 PM
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#5
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Resident Electrician Group: Members Posts: 8,345 Joined: 22-June 09 From: Midlothian TX Member No.: 10,496 Region Association: None |
Somebody please lock this thread before it gets out of control... (IMG:style_emoticons/default/biggrin.gif)
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mr2by4 |
Oct 23 2014, 08:02 PM
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#6
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Member Group: Members Posts: 182 Joined: 9-December 07 From: Fort Worth Member No.: 8,439 Region Association: Southwest Region |
There are 4 pistons in an air-coooled engine. One piston says to another, "Are we overheating?". To which the second piston says, "Holy crap a talking piston!"
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r_towle |
Oct 23 2014, 08:20 PM
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#7
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Custom Member Group: Members Posts: 24,501 Joined: 9-January 03 From: Taxachusetts Member No.: 124 Region Association: North East States |
A 1.7 liter type 4 can, with a few bolt on mods, perform almost like a stock 6
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boxsterfan |
Oct 23 2014, 08:59 PM
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#8
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914's are kewl Group: Members Posts: 1,776 Joined: 6-June 03 From: San Ramon, CA Member No.: 791 Region Association: Northern California |
What did one rust molecule say to the other rust molecule when they came upon a 914?
We have to eat this sh%t again??!! |
stugray |
Oct 23 2014, 09:48 PM
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#9
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Advanced Member Group: Members Posts: 3,824 Joined: 17-September 09 From: Longmont, CO Member No.: 10,819 Region Association: None |
A "Rust Free 914" walks into a bar.
NO IT DOESN'T! |
Larmo63 |
Oct 23 2014, 10:28 PM
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#10
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Advanced Member Group: Members Posts: 4,264 Joined: 3-March 14 From: San Clemente, Ca Member No.: 17,068 Region Association: Southern California |
A penguin is driving a 914 Porsche along the highway when, suddenly his engine starts running rough and he sees smoke in his rear view mirror. He pulls off the highway and finds the nearest service station, and pulls up to the garage with the car shaking and sputtering. He tells the mechanic what happened, and the mechanic says "OK, give me 10 minutes to check it out."
Meanwhile, the penguin sees an ice cream shop across the street. Thinking this is a perfect time for a tasty treat, he heads over and gets himself an ice cream cone. After he finishes, he walks back over to the garage, and asks the mechanic "So, did you find out what's wrong?" The mechanic looks at the penguin and says "It looks like you blew a seal." The penguin quickly wipes his face and says "Oh, no, that's just the ice cream." |
Cuda911 |
Oct 23 2014, 10:39 PM
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#11
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Senior Member Group: Members Posts: 1,489 Joined: 20-May 14 From: Oceanside (N. San Diego County), CA Member No.: 17,376 Region Association: Southern California |
A guy walks into a parts store and says "I need a gas cap for my MGB."
The store owner says, "okay, sounds like a fair trade." |
02loftsmoor |
Oct 23 2014, 10:39 PM
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#12
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Senior Member Group: Members Posts: 577 Joined: 26-June 11 From: Ft. Worth TX Member No.: 13,243 Region Association: Southwest Region |
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mgp4591 |
Oct 24 2014, 12:19 AM
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#13
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914 Guru Group: Members Posts: 5,360 Joined: 1-August 12 From: Salt Lake City Ut Member No.: 14,748 Region Association: Intermountain Region |
A stock teener looks at a modified teener and says, "What? I coulda had a V8??" (IMG:style_emoticons/default/barf.gif)
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wndsnd |
Oct 24 2014, 07:31 AM
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#14
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You wanted a horse, but got a goat. Nobody wants a goat.... Group: Members Posts: 2,861 Joined: 12-February 12 From: North Shore, MA Member No.: 14,124 Region Association: North East States |
A 1.7 liter type 4 can, with a few bolt on mods, perform almost like a stock 6 Madness, But maybe a stock 2.0 ltr 4........... (IMG:style_emoticons/default/ph34r.gif) |
mr2by4 |
Oct 24 2014, 07:40 AM
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#15
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Member Group: Members Posts: 182 Joined: 9-December 07 From: Fort Worth Member No.: 8,439 Region Association: Southwest Region |
A 1.7 liter type 4 can, with a few bolt on mods, perform almost like a stock 6 Madness, But maybe a stock 2.0 ltr 4........... (IMG:style_emoticons/default/ph34r.gif) What about a 1911 with a cam and headers? (IMG:style_emoticons/default/idea.gif) |
EdwardBlume |
Oct 24 2014, 08:03 AM
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#16
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914 Wizard Group: Members Posts: 12,338 Joined: 2-January 03 From: SLO Member No.: 81 Region Association: Central California |
A Pleasanton soccer mom is distracted while driving her SUV towards the mall. She rear ends the car in front of her. Out pops a 4 foot midget, mad as hell. He runs back to the SUV and starts jumping up and down next to her window. "I'm not happy, I'm not happy!" he screams. The Pleasanton mom calmly asked, "OK then, which one are you?"
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VegasRacer |
Oct 24 2014, 09:51 AM
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#17
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ELVIRA Group: Benefactors Posts: 8,452 Joined: 27-March 03 From: Between Scylla and Charybdis Member No.: 481 Region Association: None |
A blonde woman is driving a Porsche and she sees another blonde woman with a Porsche that has broken down on the side of the road.
She stops to ask what's wrong. The owner of the broken Porsche said, 'I just had a look under the hood, and while I was driving somebody had stolen the engine.' The other said, 'Oh, don't worry, I have a spare one in the back of my Porsche.' |
majkos |
Oct 24 2014, 09:59 AM
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#18
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Senior Member Group: Members Posts: 1,370 Joined: 29-February 04 From: Mile High 914 Member No.: 1,729 Region Association: Rocky Mountains |
what's worse than having your 914 on jack stands? (IMG:style_emoticons/default/dry.gif)
Having both of your 914's up. (IMG:style_emoticons/default/headbang.gif) |
Maltese Falcon |
Oct 24 2014, 10:26 AM
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#19
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Advanced Member Group: Members Posts: 4,620 Joined: 14-September 04 From: Mulholland SoCal Member No.: 2,755 Region Association: None |
Ferrari owner takes his car in for service, he tells the tech;
(Insert Joe Pesci accent) My crankshaft doesn't crank My con rods don't rod My battery don't bat My camshaft don't cam My pistons don't work either (IMG:style_emoticons/default/screwy.gif) |
Maltese Falcon |
Oct 24 2014, 10:30 AM
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#20
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Advanced Member Group: Members Posts: 4,620 Joined: 14-September 04 From: Mulholland SoCal Member No.: 2,755 Region Association: None |
Two jumper cables walk into a bar.
The bartender says; You are welcome to come in...but don't start nuthin' (IMG:style_emoticons/default/stirthepot.gif) |
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