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> stupid engine jokes, really stupid...
boxsterfan
post Oct 22 2014, 10:58 PM
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914's are kewl
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What did the spark plug say to the coil when it received its first jolt?

Ohm my god!!

Carry on....
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messix
post Oct 22 2014, 11:09 PM
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AKA "CLUTCH KILLER"!
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what did the 427 chevy say to the 427 ford ..... you sohc
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02loftsmoor
post Oct 22 2014, 11:34 PM
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you guys are killing me
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struckn
post Oct 23 2014, 06:52 PM
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914 said " I'm a Boxer BAM BAM BAM BAM". Harley replied " I'm a V Twin " POTATO POTATO POTATO POTATO........

(IMG:style_emoticons/default/av-943.gif)
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Mike Bellis
post Oct 23 2014, 08:00 PM
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Somebody please lock this thread before it gets out of control... (IMG:style_emoticons/default/biggrin.gif)
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mr2by4
post Oct 23 2014, 08:02 PM
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There are 4 pistons in an air-coooled engine. One piston says to another, "Are we overheating?". To which the second piston says, "Holy crap a talking piston!"
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r_towle
post Oct 23 2014, 08:20 PM
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A 1.7 liter type 4 can, with a few bolt on mods, perform almost like a stock 6
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boxsterfan
post Oct 23 2014, 08:59 PM
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What did one rust molecule say to the other rust molecule when they came upon a 914?

We have to eat this sh%t again??!!
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stugray
post Oct 23 2014, 09:48 PM
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A "Rust Free 914" walks into a bar.

NO IT DOESN'T!
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Larmo63
post Oct 23 2014, 10:28 PM
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A penguin is driving a 914 Porsche along the highway when, suddenly his engine starts running rough and he sees smoke in his rear view mirror. He pulls off the highway and finds the nearest service station, and pulls up to the garage with the car shaking and sputtering. He tells the mechanic what happened, and the mechanic says "OK, give me 10 minutes to check it out."

Meanwhile, the penguin sees an ice cream shop across the street. Thinking this is a perfect time for a tasty treat, he heads over and gets himself an ice cream cone.

After he finishes, he walks back over to the garage, and asks the mechanic "So, did you find out what's wrong?"

The mechanic looks at the penguin and says "It looks like you blew a seal."


The penguin quickly wipes his face and says "Oh, no, that's just the ice cream."
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Cuda911
post Oct 23 2014, 10:39 PM
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A guy walks into a parts store and says "I need a gas cap for my MGB."

The store owner says, "okay, sounds like a fair trade."
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02loftsmoor
post Oct 23 2014, 10:39 PM
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(IMG:style_emoticons/default/barf.gif)
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mgp4591
post Oct 24 2014, 12:19 AM
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A stock teener looks at a modified teener and says, "What? I coulda had a V8??" (IMG:style_emoticons/default/barf.gif)
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wndsnd
post Oct 24 2014, 07:31 AM
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You wanted a horse, but got a goat. Nobody wants a goat....
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QUOTE(r_towle @ Oct 23 2014, 10:20 PM) *

A 1.7 liter type 4 can, with a few bolt on mods, perform almost like a stock 6



Madness,

But maybe a stock 2.0 ltr 4...........

(IMG:style_emoticons/default/ph34r.gif)
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mr2by4
post Oct 24 2014, 07:40 AM
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QUOTE(wndsnd @ Oct 24 2014, 05:31 AM) *

QUOTE(r_towle @ Oct 23 2014, 10:20 PM) *

A 1.7 liter type 4 can, with a few bolt on mods, perform almost like a stock 6



Madness,

But maybe a stock 2.0 ltr 4...........

(IMG:style_emoticons/default/ph34r.gif)

What about a 1911 with a cam and headers? (IMG:style_emoticons/default/idea.gif)
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EdwardBlume
post Oct 24 2014, 08:03 AM
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A Pleasanton soccer mom is distracted while driving her SUV towards the mall. She rear ends the car in front of her. Out pops a 4 foot midget, mad as hell. He runs back to the SUV and starts jumping up and down next to her window. "I'm not happy, I'm not happy!" he screams. The Pleasanton mom calmly asked, "OK then, which one are you?"
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VegasRacer
post Oct 24 2014, 09:51 AM
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A blonde woman is driving a Porsche and she sees another blonde woman with a Porsche that has broken down on the side of the road.

She stops to ask what's wrong.

The owner of the broken Porsche said, 'I just had a look under the hood, and while I was driving somebody had stolen the engine.'

The other said, 'Oh, don't worry, I have a spare one in the back of my Porsche.'
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majkos
post Oct 24 2014, 09:59 AM
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what's worse than having your 914 on jack stands? (IMG:style_emoticons/default/dry.gif)

Attached Image

Having both of your 914's up. (IMG:style_emoticons/default/headbang.gif)
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Maltese Falcon
post Oct 24 2014, 10:26 AM
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Ferrari owner takes his car in for service, he tells the tech;
(Insert Joe Pesci accent)
My crankshaft doesn't crank
My con rods don't rod
My battery don't bat
My camshaft don't cam
My pistons don't work either (IMG:style_emoticons/default/screwy.gif)
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Maltese Falcon
post Oct 24 2014, 10:30 AM
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Two jumper cables walk into a bar.
The bartender says; You are welcome to come in...but don't start nuthin' (IMG:style_emoticons/default/stirthepot.gif)
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