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> Stupid things said in P-car ads
JeffBowlsby
post Aug 12 2019, 05:44 PM
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The point of this thread is to constructively poke fun at P-car advertisers that describe their cars for sale to avoid communication that may be misleading and ineffective, whether intentional or not. Its to get folks to think about the content of their ads and what they are trying to convey and how they convey that, so buyers will correctly and intuitively understand the ad and not be misled or bogged down in unimportant detail. The old 'what I said is not what you heard' dilemma. Best to just clearly state facts and not flower the ad up with all sorts of puffery or unimportant information for a buyer to make a decision - as the buyer will read it.

"This Porsche ...was built in 19__ and delivered to the first owner."
--> Why does stating this fact make anyone want to buy your car?

"This Porsche ...is equipped with a [color name] paint with traces of use."
--> its a used car...

"It has ... an adjustable front and rear suspension"
--> Don't all cars have these?

"This particular 914 left the factory fitted with the uprated 2-liter version of Volkswagen’s trusty four-cylinder “boxer” motor, which was introduced as the model’s top-of-the-range engine following the discontinuation of Porsche’s 914/6 in 1972. It offered an additional 15 bhp over its 1.8-liter sibling and 20 bhp over the standard 1.7-liter car, whilst 1973 saw improvements to the 914’s much-criticized gear change, with later models such as this benefitting from the superior “side-shift” mechanism which greatly simplified actuation."
--> Whew...gasp...take a breath... 'actuation'...huh?
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Superhawk996
post Aug 12 2019, 06:12 PM
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My personal favorite:

$X dollars invested, asking $Y.

Sometimes, X exceeds Y by a factor of 2:1 or even 3:1.

Should have done investing elsewhere! (IMG:style_emoticons/default/lol-2.gif)
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gereed75
post Aug 12 2019, 06:15 PM
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Not 914 but back in the day when I was in a dealership checking out the newly released 944, I had a sales guy tell me that the cylinders were lined with glass.

That dealership did not survive one of the down sizing cuts. The sales man is probably now selling no stick pans somewhere on late night TV

Then I once had a customer service person tell me she could make me an appointment, but it would have to be for sometime in the future. I told her that was better than an appointment for some time in the past.

She worked for Social Security. Unlike the Porsche guy, she has probably been promoted.

Oh yea Jeff, better than being built and delivered to the second owner. The first owner would be saying “ where the f is that car I ordered?”
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fixer34
post Aug 12 2019, 06:18 PM
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My personal favorite is when they spend the first 3 paragraphs telling the history of the car in general; Joint venture between VW and Porsche, throw Ferdinand Porsche's name in there, when the car was introduced, the -4 and -6 models, etc, etc.

I'm thinking anyone who is buying an almost 50 yr old car knows the history. It's not like 'hey that's a cool car-what is it?'
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Superhawk996
post Aug 12 2019, 06:20 PM
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QUOTE(gereed75 @ Aug 12 2019, 08:15 PM) *

Not 914 but back in the day when I was in a dealership checking out the newly released 944, I had a sales guy tell me that the cylinders were lined with glass.

That dealership did not survive one of the down sizing cuts. The sales man is probably now selling no stick pans somewhere on late night TV


Are you trolling me from the other thread for the thought exercise of ceramic liners or just plain old pulling my leg? (IMG:style_emoticons/default/happy11.gif) (IMG:style_emoticons/default/lol-2.gif)
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dlee6204
post Aug 12 2019, 06:27 PM
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QUOTE(fixer34 @ Aug 12 2019, 08:18 PM) *

My personal favorite is when they spend the first 3 paragraphs telling the history of the car in general; Joint venture between VW and Porsche, throw Ferdinand Porsche's name in there, when the car was introduced, the -4 and -6 models, etc, etc.

I'm thinking anyone who is buying an almost 50 yr old car knows the history. It's not like 'hey that's a cool car-what is it?'


3 paragraphs on the history and 2 sentences on the actual car for sale. (IMG:style_emoticons/default/screwy.gif)
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gereed75
post Aug 12 2019, 06:38 PM
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No superhawk, didn’t think of it but that is funny.
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80’s old school
post Aug 12 2019, 06:41 PM
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“Rust free”... ha! There are 914’s that are either rusting or being restored.
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Superhawk996
post Aug 12 2019, 06:57 PM
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(IMG:style_emoticons/default/agree.gif)

Even when restored, still probably not rust free! A few are without a doubt, but, I'm sure that won't be mine!

Mostly Rust Free just doesn't have the right ring to it. (IMG:style_emoticons/default/confused24.gif)
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Superhawk996
post Aug 12 2019, 06:59 PM
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QUOTE(gereed75 @ Aug 12 2019, 08:38 PM) *

No superhawk, didn’t think of it but that is funny.


It was! (IMG:style_emoticons/default/aktion035.gif)
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914werke
post Aug 12 2019, 09:17 PM
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QUOTE(Superhawk996 @ Aug 12 2019, 05:57 PM) *
Even when restored, still probably not rust free! Mostly Rust Free just doesn't have the right ring to it. (IMG:style_emoticons/default/confused24.gif)

(IMG:style_emoticons/default/agree.gif)
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pploco
post Aug 12 2019, 10:04 PM
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Not 914 related, but I frequent NASIOC for Subaru parts for my conversion. My favorite is when these punk flat-brim hat vapers have engine parts listed as “rare” or “vintage” for cars that are 2004 and newer.

By the time they’re old like me, I can’t imagine the words they’ll use to describe their junk.
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iankarr
post Aug 12 2019, 10:36 PM
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My favorite is "ran when parked". As if the car was towed to the spot where it was abandoned....
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80’s old school
post Aug 12 2019, 10:43 PM
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Or maybe not necessarily 914’s.... “just needs a little Freon”
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JeffBowlsby
post Aug 12 2019, 10:55 PM
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Some get too zealous:

"Excellent Restoration Candidate !"
--> Meaning this tub is beat, tired, not all there, everything wrong with it is the POs fault, and I am tired of working on it. Pay me money to inherit my problem...

"This P-car is best described as a very straight and honest, example"
--> Tell me, clearly, what makes a car 'honest'?

"The underside is functionally solid"
--> Meaning it has not potato chipped yet or it is recently repaired with unistrut and fiberglass.

"Recently replaced - valve cover gaskets, filter, oil and 3 pushrod tubes/Orings, master cylinder, passenger door, pads/rotors, and shifter bushings. Underbody steam cleaned."
--> Meaning, car had massive oil and brake fluid leaks, brakes were worn out, door was either damaged or rusted beyond usefulness and first gear may be worn out. No need to give special mention about what we expect to be your routine maintenance so why do you mention these things? They do not add value.
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Unobtanium-inc
post Aug 13 2019, 08:44 AM
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QUOTE(Superhawk996 @ Aug 12 2019, 04:57 PM) *

(IMG:style_emoticons/default/agree.gif)

Even when restored, still probably not rust free! A few are without a doubt, but, I'm sure that won't be mine!

Mostly Rust Free just doesn't have the right ring to it. (IMG:style_emoticons/default/confused24.gif)

I NEVER say "rust free". I once had a 70S that was rust free, it was really really nice on the underside. I sold it as such. It went to the UK where the guy's mechanic took a grinder and took the underside down to bare metal, found 3 spots behind the sway bar mount about the size of a dime that had rust. The mechanic said he should cut up the car for spares. He wanted half his money back because I sold him a rusty POS. I've never used the term "rust free" again, because some jackass will take up the challenge.


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mepstein
post Aug 13 2019, 09:29 AM
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QUOTE(Unobtanium-inc @ Aug 13 2019, 10:44 AM) *

QUOTE(Superhawk996 @ Aug 12 2019, 04:57 PM) *

(IMG:style_emoticons/default/agree.gif)

Even when restored, still probably not rust free! A few are without a doubt, but, I'm sure that won't be mine!

Mostly Rust Free just doesn't have the right ring to it. (IMG:style_emoticons/default/confused24.gif)

I NEVER say "rust free". I once had a 70S that was rust free, it was really really nice on the underside. I sold it as such. It went to the UK where the guy's mechanic took a grinder and took the underside down to bare metal, found 3 spots behind the sway bar mount about the size of a dime that had rust. The mechanic said he should cut up the car for spares. He wanted half his money back because I sold him a rusty POS. I've never used the term "rust free" again, because some jackass will take up the challenge.

Yea, because cars don't rust in the UK. (IMG:style_emoticons/default/laugh.gif)
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Valy
post Aug 13 2019, 03:37 PM
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"Previously owned by a San Francisco lawyer."
Do lawyers drive better than the rest of us? How about the ones from San Francisco?
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VegasRacer
post Aug 13 2019, 09:28 PM
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I still remember an ad from my college days: the seller said his heavily modified Gremlin "runs like a gerbil on acid."
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Unobtanium-inc
post Aug 13 2019, 09:40 PM
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Favorite ad of all time, "Goes like Stink!"


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