But I had a thought today.

You might be a 914 owner if....

You park the 2 year old BMW outside so your rusty 1970 914 1.7L with the huge oil leak can park in the garage when the weather gets cold or nasty.

... you don't know what the top of your jackstands look like.

You can't work in your garage any longer, cause you keep tripping on parts.

you like the smell of exhaust saturated vinyl.

You spend 2-days trying to JB Weld a broken plastic piece together, when the dealer down the street still has new ones for $12.00

(...and then you start a thread and vehemently complain about DAPO's)

You have boxes of parts you'll most likely never use but you keep them anyways as they are NLA. Sometimes having 3 or 4 of the same part and you'll buy more at the right price.

You shop the toy department (Walmart, Target) looking for that specific green Matchbox only to be disapointed time and time again.

GF gives me grief whenever were in a store and I ask "Mind if we make a detour?", I always get the roll eyes



Your 914 becomes a storage device for months on end.


You dont work on the car for long extended periods of time, but it is still your pride and joy.

you have more misc relays, nut, bolts, parts in your toolbox than you have tools.


you check in with 914world every day of your life

If you have at least one 914 that double as a storage shed to hold your garden tools!

If the guys in the X19 club won't let you post in their forums.

... you buy one in the hopes that the dying bus motor in it will limp along long enough for you to put a /6 in it.

You have large pieces of cardboard placed strategically around the garage floor.

You consider yourself a visionary because when you see a 914, your mind instantly thinks of the possibilities... (normal people don't see this)

You wonder why every car does not have that nice place to put your left hand (on the longeron) to hoist your fat ass out of the car every time you go to lean/roll out ;-)

And you wonder why with SOME cars, you have to actually climb UP to get into......

Your GF asks 'when will it be done'.

Right after payday you KNOW exactly what you will buy for the 914 before 5pm and then count down two weeks to do it again!

1. You constantly move your 914's around the barn so they will be in the way no matter what you work on. That;s why they made casters for some jack stands.
2. When you don't fall over the 914's in the way, you can always trip over it's spare parts on the floor.

You buy 911 parts although you don't own one.
You've just read all the posts on this thread and you're not going to stop at this one.

you think of your 914 as fast even though your new 4 cylinder (insert new car here) is faster in any acceleration contest.

You have extra panels around for rust fix, so you can repair your car with original sheet metal.

You have more than 2 jackstands

You watch the kragens sale adds for oil...

So true ...

Actually when your GF just knows better than to ask when it will be done.

You guys are great. You just made my day. Keep it up! Very funny...

you learned all about momentum driving.
Your 914 is faster than your beetle...and handles better.
You know how to pause between shifts and you do it on all your cars.

Rich

Everytime you log onto ebay you systematically search for 911 engines and Front struts for the conversion that you know you will do one day...

...If you've owned four different 914's in the last 20 years and never driven any of them.

When you only own one and feel lonely.

If you have more than 6 pieces of clothing that honor, commorate, or picture the 914....

If you have a separate photo album for 914 pics....

If you've ever camped for a week out of a 914.....

And, yes, I'm guilty.......and I love it......

you have a full toolbox dedicated to it... all your other cars use the missing pieces toolbox (as does the neighbor if he ask)

you actually know what a Ninja Trunk Monkey is and let people like Clay be your friend.

... you get excited to learn there is a guy just down the street who also owns a 914... that doesn't run... that he has never driven...

You've had an order screwed up by a parts dealer in Atlanta........

instead of MPG you keep track of how many quarts of oil your 914 is consuming.

you own enough spare parts to build 2 more 914s... if you only had another bare tub.

your wife has gone to work on a Monday with grease under her fingernails from helping you change the clutch in HER 914 on Sunday.


you save large cardboard boxes so you have cardboard to put under your 914.

you find yourself saying "I'll have it running next year" the next 5 years or more.

You think it's normal to open your trunk to put gas in your car.

You're taking a welding class at the Junior College.

You think 911s are donor cars

You get more excited seeing another 914 on the road than the latest new (fill in the blank) car.

hence the 'secret wave'........ (three fingers down) named: Jack Stand Wave.


You know you are addicted when..... A Tranny Clinic involving a Doctor gets you excited to hang out with men for two days!

After hitting the twisties you think your GF is asleep....when really she's trying not to puke

you wish you could canablize that $30k 930 turbo on craigslist 'cause it's just a damn assdragger anyways.. and the parts would do much better on my $3500 914....

You think of things to laugh about that you read in this thread, while you daydream at work tomorrow planning your next 4 hours lying under that damnable 914, fondly knowing you will be breaking open new bleeding wounds on your hand, arms and head, and loving every minute of it.

And here's another one that I didn't even have to think hard about..........

You think it is perfectly normal to want to read all of these hilarious entries in this thread to your GF the next time you log into 914World at her house, and she rolls her eyes, viewed on the laptop you bought her to have access to 914World and all your Porsche pictures at her house when you are actually not in your garage doting on your 914(s).

.... you MAYBE own a 914?

Is this really the second time this thread has existed?

Ohhhh sheeeet! I've got almost all of these "ifs"!

well the BMer is two years old, but a "newer than the 914" 85, as is the 88 Westy - both parked outside for a rusty parts tub & a rust 914 to repair/resto, & part-n-shit everywhere!

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I think I'm in deep doo-doo!

Your radio is a priority in cold weather so you don't have to be bothered by the damn roof seals squeaking and other misc. noises.

If.... You have been collecting every 914 magazine article you can find for the last 23 years and putting them in a binder with a "custom" cover.
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You just bought your first 914 and immediately start searching for a parts car instead of enjoying the honeymoon phase.

The first APP you ever bought for your Ipad was PDF reader, just so you could put the 914 manuals on it.

Works awesome BTW.