Went to a TR rally with my dad a long time ago and they had a motorkhana event. It was fascinating, but haven't seen anything like it since. Youtube tells me it's pretty common in Europe. Not a thing around here? Anyone ever motorkhana a 914?

Check out gymkhana

They're also sometimes called "gimmick rallies" or "poker runs." There are a number of clubs that put on things like this around the USA. In SoCal, I participate with ITN (Google "ITN rally" for info), who put on Monte Carlo style rallies, which are like timed and scored orienteering in a car. The SCCA sponsors time-speed-distance rallies at least one Friday evening a month around SoCal, but I find those to be a bit too focused for my tastes.

Not gymkhana... This is what I'm talking about:
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=g9t1iV0RsJY

Tighter course, not all fwd. Notice the marshals watching to make sure both wheels cross the lines in certain parts. I've seen all types of cars doing this, but at the extreme end of the spectrum, they use purpose built cars. It looks like a riot.

Seems like the way a 914 is balanced, it could do this really well.

I haven't seen one of these yet, but I'm IN if I do -- looks like a lot of fun!

My trans would pop with all that aggressive reverse to forward.

Yeah, I think some of these are purpose-built. The stock cars I've seen move through these courses at a much calmer pace. But for the extreme end of the spectrum, check this guy out:
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=H3U7NktNj1o