The 914 Before Christmas

Twas the night before Christmas, and out in the shed
Sat a tired old Four Teener, its battery dead.

Its fenders were rusted, the floorplan had holes,
The seats and the carpets all eaten by voles.

The tires had dry-rot, the gas tank was leaking,
a turn of the wheel sent its tie rods a-creaking.

So I put on my coat with a weight in my heart,
and went out to the shed in hopes it would start.

The engine turned over- - then arose such a clatter,
I knew from the sound its fuel pump would soon shatter.

From under the dash there came a blinding white flash,
low and behold, its wiring harness had just turned to ash.

"I've had it with Porsches" I quietly swore.
"Enough is too much, I can't take anymore!"

When what to my red teary eyes should suddenly appear,
but a funny old German (Heck, I could sure use a beer!)
"Gutten nacht" he said, lookin' somewhat scary.
"You need any help? Mein friends call me Ferry"

"This one can be saved, there's no reason to grieve.
All you need man is some faith -- Man, you gotta believe!"

"A hammer! Some duct tape! Get me more tools!
With these freaking cars, we just make up the rules!
We'll get her cranked over-no way that she'll stall.
But stand over there with your back to the wall."

The ghost winked at me and said, kicking a tire,
"Whatever you do, don't touch this brown wire!"

The old man then vanished amid sneezes and farts,
But when all the smoke cleared, he had left me some parts.

So I opened the shed door and took off the top,
Put pedal to metal, and cruised out non-stop.

I thought to myself as I missed second gear,
Merry Christmas to All, and a Happy New Year.

Very cute

Nice to experience rare talent

Well done!