 PC: Sharing The Joy, "Several Guys Owe Me Lunch" |
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| SLITS |
 Apr 26 2005, 02:33 PM
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#1
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"This Utah shit is HARSH!"  Group: Benefactors Posts: 13,602 Joined: 22-February 04 From: SoCal Mountains ... Member No.: 1,696 Region Association: None   |
Ok, I've read Old Joe Sharp's and Toast's account of my encounter with the Ventura Sheriff and have been insulted by the Arizona chapter about "sharing a cell with Brad", So maybe it's time to give the account from my eyes and ears....
Friday Nite...WCC2005....Joe Sharp's Rolling Brothel and Tequila Storage Facility Motorhome.....I must have drank most of the ToKillYa. Saturday Morn...."How did I get here?"....Any information is welcome. No Pics please..The view from my eyes is REALLY bad. Poker Run.....Old Joe starts out behind me in his beautimous sixer chasing Der Weisze Bandit mit the mighty four. He is unable to gain much on me as we roll down the highway and start the twisties and at that point I lose contact with him in the mirrors. I come upon a line of teeners and proceed to make an outside pass. No problems...Jason in the Otto's Bumblebee takes offense and gives chase. Old Joe is nowhere in sight. We continue and Jason almost misses one of the required turns as I brake hard for an uphill righthander. Where's Joe (IMG:http://www.914world.com/bbs2/html/emoticons/confused24.gif) We are now rolling thru the "Land of Money I will never have" when we come upon a straight with a "Student Driver" in the lead of a sixer. A quick decision is made that the two car pass will present no problems setting up for the 90 degree left hander I can see in the distance....so one gear down...foot to the floor...I make the pass and kick it into 5th the Tachometer hits 5200 rpm as I drop back in. I'm setting the line I'm going to take as I see the odd colored domestic sedan hiding behind a bush and go hard on the brakes. Just a tad to late as I make the 90 degree. So I'm busted and find the nearest MBZ driveway to pull into and shut the Bandit off awaiting the arrival of the Blue Meanies. I am assembling the necessary papers as the BM approached from the rear. At reaching the door, the following conversation occurs: BM....Give me a reason for not arresting you and impounding your car (very loud voice) Slits...Ummm, I don't have one. BM...Do you know how fast you were going? Slits...Not really, but I was in the lead (IMG:http://www.914world.com/bbs2/html/emoticons/biggrin.gif) BM...We take reckless driving very seriously here because of the Bicyclists. Slits...I was watching for them and didn't hit any. BM...Give me a reason for not impounding your car! Slits....I don't have one. BM....No narrative here as it was a 10-15 minute scalding of reckless driving, high speed, bicyclists problems they were having and a general dressing down. I held my head in the appropriate position indicating submission (it was really hurting from the ToKillYa and I didn't want him to see my eyes closed). Slits...15 minutes later...Yes Sir, I understand your postion and am willing to suffer the consequences. Would you like me to step out of the car so you can handcuff me? BM....No, wait here Slits...I hadn't planned on going anywhere. Intermission...background sounds of radio calls, birds chirping and other teeners motoring by with a horn honk here and there. BM....Well you seem like a good guy, so I have written this citation for 80 in a 55 which will help you a bit on the fine amount. This is a 40 zone and I am not a Highway Patrolman. Slits...I am eternally grateful. I am sorry that my exerbuence got a bit out of hand. (IMG:http://www.914world.com/bbs2/html/emoticons/pray.gif) Enter a semi-english speaking bicyclist..name unknown, but sounded like Sir Andy. "You did a 360 at the top of the hill, out of control" Slits...I'm sorry Sir...that was not me..I do not lose control of my car in a turn. SESB (see above..semi english......)...It was a car just like this one (speaking to the BM) Slits...Sir, there are only about 99 more of these on the highway today. BM to SESB....Sir, it wasn't him, so pedal down the road a bit and I will come talk to you after I'm finished. BM to Slits....Please sign here (offering a pen) Slits....I have my own sir. BM....Here is your copy and slow down. We have a lot of problems with the Bicyclists...They even get into fights with each other over road space and you sports car guys and motorcylists don't help any. By the way, I would have pulled all six of you over, but I'm only one guy and you're it. Tell your friends they owe you a real nice dinner for this one. Slits...They're to cheap to do that. They are all 914 owners. Have a good day sir. Exit to the sound of the mighty four at 2500 rpm, drounding out the chirping birds and bicyclists threats of harm. Oh, BTW....has anybody seen Old Joe Sharp? |
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Replies(1 - 19)
| nebreitling |
Apr 26 2005, 02:40 PM
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#2
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Member Emeritus Group: Members Posts: 3,314 Joined: 26-March 03 From: San Francisco Member No.: 478 |
(IMG:http://www.914world.com/bbs2/html/emoticons/smilie_pokal.gif) I nominate this thread for the CLASSICS section!
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| MattR |
Apr 26 2005, 02:43 PM
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#3
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Advanced Member Group: Members Posts: 3,279 Joined: 23-January 04 From: SF Bay Area Member No.: 1,589 Region Association: Northern California |
(IMG:http://www.914world.com/bbs2/html/emoticons/chairfall.gif)
this is too funny... "BM...Do you know how fast you were going? Slits...Not really, but I was in the lead (IMG:http://www.914world.com/bbs2/html/emoticons/biggrin.gif)" So is this a petition for a maximum driving age??? |
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| Jenny |
Apr 26 2005, 02:43 PM
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#4
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Advanced Member Group: Members Posts: 4,060 Joined: 6-January 03 Member No.: 96 Region Association: None |
Way to take one for the team. (IMG:http://www.914world.com/bbs2/html/emoticons/smilie_pokal.gif) Not for John and I though. We were going the wrong way for the most part. But it was fun!
Jen |
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| Aaron Cox |
Apr 26 2005, 02:46 PM
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#5
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Professional Lawn Dart Group: Retired Admin Posts: 24,541 Joined: 1-February 03 From: OC Member No.: 219 Region Association: Southern California |
ron... how was the wedding?
btw- your eyes werent that bloodshot on sat... |
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| SLITS |
Apr 26 2005, 02:52 PM
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#6
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"This Utah shit is HARSH!" Group: Benefactors Posts: 13,602 Joined: 22-February 04 From: SoCal Mountains ... Member No.: 1,696 Region Association: None |
You didn't get close enough to see...my breath wouda killed ya. The wedding...what wedding...oh yea....It was a tear jerker (Slits' softer side) |
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| JB 914 |
Apr 26 2005, 02:52 PM
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#7
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Daddy! Finish my car NOW!!! Group: Members Posts: 1,593 Joined: 26-September 04 From: Garden Grove, CA Member No.: 2,831 |
Like you could tell. you were blowing dust and talking like someone put shag carpet on your tongue (IMG:http://www.914world.com/bbs2/html/emoticons/blink.gif) (IMG:http://www.914world.com/bbs2/html/emoticons/wacko.gif) (IMG:http://www.914world.com/bbs2/html/emoticons/icon8.gif) |
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| Aaron Cox |
Apr 26 2005, 02:56 PM
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#8
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Professional Lawn Dart Group: Retired Admin Posts: 24,541 Joined: 1-February 03 From: OC Member No.: 219 Region Association: Southern California |
no way..... (IMG:http://www.914world.com/bbs2/html/emoticons/dry.gif) (IMG:http://www.914world.com/bbs2/html/emoticons/blink.gif) ron has a soft side? no way! all those years of being a crotchety old man gone? (IMG:http://www.914world.com/bbs2/html/emoticons/laugh.gif) |
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| MattR |
Apr 26 2005, 03:00 PM
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#9
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Advanced Member Group: Members Posts: 3,279 Joined: 23-January 04 From: SF Bay Area Member No.: 1,589 Region Association: Northern California |
Nah, thats why they make viagra. (IMG:http://www.914world.com/bbs2/html/emoticons/barf.gif) |
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| Allan |
Apr 26 2005, 03:02 PM
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#11
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Teenerless Weenie Group: Members Posts: 8,373 Joined: 5-July 04 From: Western Mesopotamia Member No.: 2,304 Region Association: Southern California |
That sucks Ron. I wasn't around to see it or contribute but I'll buy ya lunch anyway. Those stupid ass bicyclists are idiots. (IMG:http://www.914world.com/bbs2/html/emoticons/ar15.gif) I came around at least 3 blind steep uphill curves to find them right in the middle of the road doing -1 mph.
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| balljoint |
Apr 26 2005, 03:02 PM
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#12
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914 Wizard Group: Members Posts: 10,000 Joined: 6-April 04 Member No.: 1,897 Region Association: None |
Beautiful. Just beautiful.
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| tat2dphreak |
Apr 26 2005, 03:04 PM
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#13
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stoya, stoya, stoya Group: Benefactors Posts: 8,797 Joined: 6-June 03 From: Wylie, TX Member No.: 792 Region Association: Southwest Region |
LMAO! that's great!! (IMG:http://www.914world.com/bbs2/html/emoticons/lol2.gif) (IMG:http://www.914world.com/bbs2/html/emoticons/chairfall.gif) (IMG:http://www.914world.com/bbs2/html/emoticons/laugh.gif)
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| Reiche |
Apr 26 2005, 03:24 PM
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#14
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Member Group: Members Posts: 169 Joined: 13-October 04 From: Vista, CA Member No.: 2,934 |
Oh My God That's Funny. Sorry about the ticket, but at least you have a great story.
This isn't funny:
Maybe so, but if they hit your car you aren't dead. Yeah, my other car is a bicycle. I've never hit a car, but I have been hit by cars twice: once on a coned-off parking lot race course, another time in a bike lane. Neither time was I where I wasn't supposed to be. I got off lucky, but I knew two people who were killed in bike/car collisions. So I take this seriously. Share the road. |
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| Allan |
Apr 26 2005, 03:40 PM
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#15
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Teenerless Weenie Group: Members Posts: 8,373 Joined: 5-July 04 From: Western Mesopotamia Member No.: 2,304 Region Association: Southern California |
I admire the people that can endure the type of riding they do, but c'mon, at least stay to the side of the road and not on the center line
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| Aaron Cox |
Apr 26 2005, 03:41 PM
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#16
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Professional Lawn Dart Group: Retired Admin Posts: 24,541 Joined: 1-February 03 From: OC Member No.: 219 Region Association: Southern California |
real bikes belong on trails my other ride is a mt bike (IMG:http://www.914world.com/bbs2/html/emoticons/biggrin.gif) |
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| Jenny |
Apr 26 2005, 03:55 PM
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#17
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Advanced Member Group: Members Posts: 4,060 Joined: 6-January 03 Member No.: 96 Region Association: None |
I agree with the whole share the road sentiment. But, then again,most cyclists I see have a holier than thou complex. They are in a mode of transportation, and are using the road, just like cars & motorcycles. Yet I rarely see them actually stop for a red light, or stop signs. Or they ride on sidewalks. Either you walk on sidewalks, or ride/drive in the street. I don't coast up to a red light in my 914, check traffic on both sides, and glide thru the intersection like moses parting the sea. (IMG:http://www.914world.com/bbs2/html/emoticons/rolleyes.gif) Maybe this only pertains to the San Francisco bay area bicycle riding hippies. (IMG:http://www.914world.com/bbs2/html/emoticons/wacko.gif) I'm not one to judge. (IMG:http://www.914world.com/bbs2/html/emoticons/wink.gif) Jen |
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| Howard |
Apr 26 2005, 04:10 PM
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#18
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Incontin(g)ent Member Group: Benefactors Posts: 5,785 Joined: 24-July 03 From: Westlake Village, CA Member No.: 943 Region Association: None
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Like you can really deal with a grown man who wears spandex? (IMG:http://www.914world.com/bbs2/html/emoticons/idea.gif)
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| Joe Bob |
Apr 26 2005, 04:39 PM
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#19
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Retired admin, banned a few times Group: Members Posts: 17,427 Joined: 24-December 02 From: Boulder CO Member No.: 5 Region Association: None |
UCSB....the Republik of Isla Vista has a long standing student policy of blowing thru stop sign and light w/o even a tap on the brakes. Been going on like that for 20 years.
Local University Police and the CHP finally started pulling students and "spandex bikers" over last week and issuing 150 dollar tickets. They also were citing for earphones. I agree, a lot of bikers are morons, but there are a lot of asshole drivers that think nothing of blowing the horn or smacking them with side view mirrors. Dorks on both sides. (IMG:http://www.914world.com/bbs2/html/emoticons/cool_shades.gif) |
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| redshift |
Apr 26 2005, 04:48 PM
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#20
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Bless the Hell out of you! Group: Members Posts: 10,926 Joined: 29-June 03 Member No.: 869 |
WTG MAN! You rock!
About 10 years ago, I was being setup for a heist, I was driving through a bad part of town at about 2AM, with peeps all standing in the street. This one guy on a bicycle was rolling head-on towards me, and I would have to either stop, or hit him. The added 400rpm should have been enough warning "I don't stop for crackheads on bikes", but his face looked real funny at the last second, just before he took flying lessons. 65 in a 35, he can come get what's left of his Huffy, anytime. Nice job on the law, Ronster. M |
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