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> OT: Houston, we've got a...., ... new Kalifornia transplant?
Carlitos Way
post May 22 2008, 04:08 PM
Post #1


I did it MY WAY
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I had a phone interview with a company in Houston today. Looks promising. Could be relocating to the area.

Any thoughts/suggestions on moving to and/or living in Houston?

Thanks,

C:>
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SLITS
post May 23 2008, 11:12 AM
Post #2


"This Utah shit is HARSH!"
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Ok, most of this has been a good joke .... Texans have no sense of humor ... but when I lived in Sugarland/Safford area:

1.) Heat and humidity was intense ... 98 degrees / 98% Humidity from February thru November.

2.) Influx of East Coasters, Northerners, etc., was nutz. They couldn't build the area up fast enough for the influx.

3.) They took away the natives' horses and gave them all Monte Carlos. If the "hicks" didn't like the way the loop was progresssing, they just drove off it.

4.) Rifle racks were outlawed in Harris County due to the gunfights on the flippin' freeways. It was a state law that you had to carry a 45 under the seat of your car and a six pack of Lone Star on the seat next to you.

5.) Houston had more corrupt police and judges than the entire rest of the country.

6.) Their "Blue Laws" to make everyone go to church were a fuchin' joke.

7.) You couldn't go outside until the freakin' sun went down to enjoy anything.

8.) The swimming pool water was hotter than the water I took a bath in.

9.) Texas women were for the most part beautiful .... until they opened their mouth and talked.

10.) The Chip Channel (note** they called it the Ship Channel) was so polluted even Satan could walk on water.

11.) Buildings were sinking in downtown Houston due to subsidence(?).

12.) The bugs were so numerous and large they would carry off small children and cattle. Flights of Love Bugs were really trippy.

13.) You could find the Judge in Anuyack(?), Tx (east of Baytown) either at the Gas Station, Pool Hall or home.

14.) In Rodgers, Tx, they hid the speed limit sign behind a bush and paid for a new radar setup for the only cop with revenue from the tickets.

15.) The Texas two-step was invented 'cause that's as high as they could count on fingers and toes.

16.) Billy Bobs in Fort Worth was a barn.

17.) In West Texas they planted community crops ... the wind blew so fierce that the seeds would blow from one field to the other and then back.

18.) Red dirt stains your socks , underwear and anything else it comes into contact with. Fortunately, chewing gum picks up the chunks you breathe and polishes your teeth (assuming you have any).

19.) Pearl was the dream beer from the Land Of A Thousand Latrines

20.) Luckenbock, Tx was a shit-hole and Waylon, Willie and the Boys never slept there.

21.) In Market Center (Dallas), the hookers would knock on your hotel room door at 9 PM looking for a date.

22.) The County Mounties all looked like Bueford T. Justice and talked the same way.

These are a few of my fond rememberances of Texas. Oh, by the way ... when I left Texas and crossed the line into New Mexico, I took the Texas Plates off my car and threw them back into Texas ... I then pissed on them from New Mexico.
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Carlitos Way   OT: Houston, we've got a....   May 22 2008, 04:08 PM
SLITS   Yeh .... I went there in 1977 and spent the next 4...   May 22 2008, 04:22 PM
Grelber   Move to Dallas and commute. It's only a 4 hour...   May 22 2008, 04:38 PM
TROJANMAN   In other words, he should reconsider his move? :hi...   May 22 2008, 04:41 PM
purple   All of you texas haters from california can kindly...   May 22 2008, 04:43 PM
Cap'n Krusty   I thought Viet Nam was humid, until I lived in Was...   May 22 2008, 04:56 PM
Carlitos Way   I thought Viet Nam was humid, until I lived in Wa...   May 22 2008, 05:05 PM
Gint   This isn't gonna be pretty...   May 22 2008, 05:08 PM
purple   My teener does well here when kept in the garage, ...   May 22 2008, 05:08 PM
So.Cal.914   :rotfl: :rotfl: :rotfl: I knew someone woul...   May 22 2008, 05:11 PM
TROJANMAN   :lol:   May 22 2008, 05:15 PM
purple   people from california like the middle....austin. ...   May 22 2008, 05:25 PM
ericread   people from california like the middle....austin....   May 23 2008, 09:31 AM
SLITS   [quote name='purple' post='1035495' date='May 22 ...   May 23 2008, 09:46 AM
Grelber   [quote name='purple' post='1035495' date='May 22...   May 23 2008, 09:49 AM
purple   [quote name='SLITS' post='1035788' date='May 23 2...   May 23 2008, 09:53 AM
SLITS   If it weren't for the Kalifornia transplants, ...   May 22 2008, 05:33 PM
purple   If it weren't for the Kalifornia transplants,...   May 22 2008, 05:42 PM
Slider   I'm a transplant....i just like it better he...   May 22 2008, 06:24 PM
So.Cal.914   Sorry...That Smilie just slipped out. :rolleyes:   May 22 2008, 05:40 PM
Eric_Shea   Well that fuch'n explains it! Move Slit...   May 22 2008, 05:45 PM
purple   It's hard to be the butt of the nation's j...   May 22 2008, 05:55 PM
George H.   houston is nice and the people are friendly and ...   May 22 2008, 06:11 PM
sww914   I used to work with a guy from Huston. He was big....   May 22 2008, 06:00 PM
Headrage   It's hard to be the butt of the nation's ...   May 22 2008, 06:06 PM
Carlitos Way   It's hard to be the butt of the nation's...   May 22 2008, 06:08 PM
BKLA   [quote name='Headrage' post='1035529' date='May 2...   May 23 2008, 03:33 PM
TROJANMAN   It's hard to be the butt of the nation's...   May 23 2008, 11:36 AM
stateofidleness   i love texas :) home of the spurs ;) goin' for...   May 22 2008, 06:10 PM
dakotaewing   Carlitos - Houston can be a good/great place to li...   May 22 2008, 06:21 PM
JB 914   I grew up in Houston and I've lived in Orange ...   May 22 2008, 06:25 PM
So.Cal.914   Not True?:huh:   May 22 2008, 06:44 PM
David_S   One afternoon, a Texan was being driven around the...   May 22 2008, 07:51 PM
914Sixer   I worked in Baytown(East side of Houston) from 198...   May 22 2008, 08:51 PM
purple   baytown? omg man, i'm sorry :(   May 23 2008, 09:03 AM
purple   I forgot the best part.... You get to say 'ya...   May 23 2008, 10:05 AM
ericread   I forgot the best part.... You get to say 'y...   May 23 2008, 10:10 AM
purple   I forgot the best part.... You get to say ...   May 23 2008, 11:01 AM
SLITS   Ok, most of this has been a good joke .... Texans ...   May 23 2008, 11:12 AM
purple   I give up... the superiority complex of californi...   May 23 2008, 11:16 AM
ericread   I give up... the superiority complex of californ...   May 23 2008, 11:54 AM
stateofidleness   I like how people automatically associated "T...   May 23 2008, 11:22 AM
purple   I like how people automatically associated ...   May 23 2008, 12:54 PM
xperu   I like how people automatically associated ...   May 23 2008, 01:30 PM
purple   texas doesnt suck overall. every place has its ups...   May 23 2008, 12:51 PM
ericread   texas doesnt suck overall. every place has its up...   May 23 2008, 01:31 PM
So.Cal.914   I hope you know I'm joking. I've spent a...   May 23 2008, 02:50 PM
stateofidleness   at the Arsenal Downtown. and yep, that's my bo...   May 23 2008, 01:14 PM
Grelber   I was born and raised just north of Bakersfield, a...   May 23 2008, 02:31 PM
stateofidleness   i think the punchline was implied ;)   May 23 2008, 03:53 PM
Eric_Shea   I think you're all f'd up. Noth'n but...   May 23 2008, 04:22 PM


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