OT: Gotta Rant I'm sure you understand, small amount of rave also Options

[tdgray]

Just hadta get this off my chest....

OK so yesterday was my birthday, my wife's birthday is 10 days before. So like every year we try to get out by ourselves (read NO KIDS) and do something we both enjoy.

For the past several years we choose a concert at a local outdoor venue called Blossom Music Center. I know for those of you on the left coast this probably not a big deal, but here this is a treat. This venue is one of the most beautiful places to watch a concert in the whole country. Completely wooded, large lawn to sit on surrounding a covered stage and seating area. It really is the shit, just sitting under the stars listening to music.

So last night we venture out to Blossom, collapsable chairs in tow and head for our favorite spot right underneath a tree with a good view of the stage but slightly away from the crowd. WELL here comes the RANT.

OK F' Heads.... here are a few things you should NOT do or bring to a concert.

1) A less than two month old baby. Listen you f'in moron. I'm sorry that you probably got knocked up by your sleazy asshat of a boyfriend, but you should stay home for awhile after the birth of a baby. When I am listening to music I do not want your mistake of the gene pool kid screaming for an hour straight right in from of me. GET IT. (IMG:http://www.914world.com/bbs2/html/emoticons/finger.gif)

2) To the same idiot slut puppy with the kid. Thank you for sitting in front of me, otherwise I would not have has the pleasure (IMG:http://www.914world.com/bbs2/html/emoticons/icon8.gif) of seeing your ass crack everytime (which was quite often) that you got up to go get a beer or have a smoke. BTW when you obviously just had a baby low rise jeans are probably not the way to go. I've seen less blubber on pacific whales.

3) This brings us to attire. Now this can be good or bad. The good we will dispense with immediately. I LOVE summer (IMG:http://www.914world.com/bbs2/html/emoticons/wub.gif) nothin like good lookin women in sundresses and shorts with belly shirts. With that stated we can move on to the other 90% of the population. If you are pushing maximum density... it is not attractive nor recommended for you to wear Spandex, low rise jeans, babydoll tees, a bikini top or a miniskirt. Please spare all of us from attempting to poke our minds eye out for the rest of the night after you bent over to pick up your large bucket of chicken and spilt your spandex pants. I'm really not sure how you did this but I'm sure there were some laws of physics that were altered last night.

4) Gay threesome sitting to the front-left of us. It took me awhile to realize that the little black fella was really a man. After that I realized that you were all flaming homo's... not that there is anything wrong with that. OH WAIT yes there is, when you are doing dirty laps dances in front of hundreds of people which included biting your BF's crotch. Oh and BTW I'm am not really sure "Sweet Baby James" is all that appropriate of a song for a lap dance anyway.

5) Really DRUNK mid-forties chick. I understand that you really like James Taylor, I do to, that's why I chose to come here to see him. But you screaming every five minutes " I love you James" is really not nessesary. As if your very weird "dancing" was not enough for all of us to notice you, this definitley clinched it.

EDIT - Added. I forgot one

6) To the large bunch of early twenties girls and two guys sitting to our immediate right. Hell... even I was to young to have seen JT when his music first came out. WTF are you doing here (IMG:http://www.914world.com/bbs2/html/emoticons/confused24.gif) . Second, this was not a loud rock concert... maybe you got the date wrong, I think OZZFEST is like next week or something. Anyway, if you just wanted a place to sit and chat with your friends there are any number of places... coffee shops, bars, public parks anything. I did not really need to know about your love life or lack there of, weight problems, who is dissing who at school / work, or any of the other drivel that you spouted practically at the top of your lungs all night. If I had some duct tape handy I most certainly would have gone to jail last night for taping all of you stupid screaching mouths shut and then rolling you down the hill. It's a concert.... listen to the f'in music and STFU.

RAVE ON: I know, I know... I'm getting old but hell I like JT's music. Has a timless quality to it. FWIW James was freakin nails. The guy has to be in his late 50's but his voice sounds perfect and the musicians were top notch. The music that I could hear was fanatstic, he played quite a few hits but also mixed in a few lesser know songs as well as covers of a few other bands. Excellent concert. WTG JT (IMG:http://www.914world.com/bbs2/html/emoticons/clap.gif)

Oh yea.... and the best thing. The tickets were only $25.00

This post has been edited by tdgray: Jun 23 2005, 07:28 AM