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> G&R ALL 914 RUSTY PARTS SWAP MEET & ANIMAL FLESH ROAST, At least one more before I die
SLITS
post Sep 20 2014, 10:20 AM
Post #1


"This Utah shit is HARSH!"
**********

Group: Benefactors
Posts: 13,602
Joined: 22-February 04
From: SoCal Mountains ...
Member No.: 1,696
Region Association: None



After much thought and a conference with Glenn, we have decided to hold this most prestigious event on:

October 26, 2014

For the newbies and the old pharts that can't remember shit, it will be held between the hours of 7 AM and ? at the following address:

2727 Kansas Ave
Riverside, CA 92507


This address is near the intersection of the 60 / 91 / 215 Freeways (at least they are still free) in Riverside, CA. If you don't own a GPS or some kinda new phangled phone that acts as a GPS, PM me your location and I will give you directions. (IMG:style_emoticons/default/happy11.gif) In reality, it's just to much shit to type.

In reality, most ALL Porsches are welcome. Gaymans, Kayennes, 356s, 550s, Macams and 911s are all welcome. We do have one exception to the lineage and that is the Panamera. Our new Rail Gun has been installed and they will be destroyed prior to entering our gate. No worries about the occupants of the vehicle? as Scotty will be available to beam humans out of the disgrace prior to it's destruction.

I will open the gate somewhere around 6:30 AM for those that can't sleep in anticipation of this fabulous event.

We will have grease and sugar laced edibles with a liquid black colloidal suspension for those that didn't make Mickey D's, Lennies or any other psuedo restaurant prior to arrival. This combination is actually FREE.

Around 10 AM we will fire the BBQ for our normal offering of Bovine Flesh Patties with a yellow fatty substance melted on them and tube steak made from the finest floor sweepings the USDA has approved. Bags of cholesterol laden potatoes, potatoe salad, macaroni salad, leafy green stuff, onions, tomatoes, yellow baby shit, 100 island dressing and mashed tomatoes will be provided for you to adorn your patty, tube steak or plate. Water and Fizzy flavored water will be provided. Anything else you must bring. If we are unlucky, some fool may make molten steel chili also. For all of this gastronomical delight we will ask for a $5.00 donation per person to imbibe. You must bring your own Pepto Dismal, Zantac, Tums or acid reducing pills.

*** Yes, we will have vegan patties/tubes for those "special people" that think by eating them they will be healthier and live longer.***

Some notable events for you to see:

1.) The Grey Ghost will still be leaking copious amounts of oil while sitting still.
2.) Glenn's 3.0 L conversion might still be in the "stink bug" configuration as it has been for the last 4 years.
3.) Jim Burke's 914 rusty restoration project will be in the "nose high" configuration as he is a "Dark Side Commander" and shudders every time he gets near the 914.
4.) Since it is close to winter, The Schlitzalom will be burned for heat. Gas masks will be provided for the toxic fumes, both from the fiberglass and Slits passing gas.
5.) Bernie Thomas son's trashed, rusty914 will still be for sale at an ungodly, unrealistic price.
6.) The garage may be clean as the water pump rebuilder has decided to move his business, but my junk valuable parts will still litter the area.
7.) Elliot may show up in his "Orange RTV Special".
8.) Kent, aka "Redneck" may show up in his "Porsubie".

We may have a sign in sheet that insulates The Recycler Core Company from any litigation involving attendance at this event.

Regardless, bring your valuable junk parts, spread them on the tarmac and see if you can con someone into purchasing it. Swap spaces are always free. Should no one throw dollars at your stuff, we do have a roll-off available for you to store it for infinity (or until it gets to the smelter).

Just a couple of reminders for you to consider:

1.) If your car is low or your trailer tongue is dragging on the ground, the approach ramp to the gate is steep (per City regs) so enter carefully.
2.) The area is under 24 hour video surveillance.
3.) We have a single unisex bathroom, so be kind to your fellow inmates.
4.) I will attempt placing trash receptacles at various locations. Please use them. Hopefully you will separate plastics/glass from the uneaten food (it's really stinky and sticky to go through it a couple of days later).

No other rules / warnings that I can think of at the moment.

Sorry folks, no political statements or prejudicial statements in this announcement as I have turned over a new leaf covering the jewels. My most heartfelt thanks to the Canadians for my wardrobe. I just hope it doesn't turn brown before the occasion.

Glenn and I look forward to seeing all of you again in the winter version of the G&R.

***The G&R has no affiliation with Porsche other than the fact I can speil it.***

I am done for the moment.




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