Stupid Things done while working on a 914., C'mon..... Fess Up! Options

[Dr Evil]

Oh ya, then there was the time I was using a cupped wire wheel on a drill to remove crap from a part. Sitting in the full lotus position (indian style) the part in my lap, the wire wheel grabbed ahold of my shirt and the handle of the drill whacked me right in the nuts. My shirt ended up all around the bit and the drill up by my chin.

...man that hurt.

[Joe Ricard]

Brand new 18V Milwaukee drill, 300.00
New Cobalt 3/8" drill bit 10.00

needed to drill hole through engine tray to run new gas line etc. lined it up had to put thumb on trigger to drill from underside. Drill bit quickly broke through the sheet metal and screwed it's way to the chuck.
Pinned my thumb against the trigger and the car body.
new drill had so much torque it smashed my thumb and I couldn't let go. Just kept twisting with me pinned and squirming.
Finally reached around and pushed the reverse switch and it let go. THEN IT STARTED TO HURT.

Purple thumb and teaching the nieghbor kids some new cuss words Priceless. (IMG:http://www.914world.com/bbs2/html/emoticons/slap.gif)

[TJB/914]

I like these stories. Not 914, but a stupid first weld job.

Growing up in the mid 50's I put a 1953 331 cu in Chrysler Hemi in my 53 Ford Cpe (my first car out of school). Had to drop the tie rod for clearance under the oil pan. I worked in a gas station (part time) pumping gas & got to use the hoist, welding equipment etc. (Remember guys this was back in the 50's). I welded up the tie rod and installed everything. Fired up the Hemi for the first time & took it out to the local night time drag strip. Burned rubber through all gears & bured the speedo for about a mile run. Brought it back to the gas station and was turning the wheel hard to back into the garage. The steering wheel turned in my hand when the tie rod welds broke in half. That day I learned about full penetration welds.

The other dumb thing I did that night. All my buddies were standing around looking at my weld job when two young good looking gals drove up to the gas pumps in a new 1955 chevy convt with the top down. The driver said before you pump gas please check my oil. She popped the hood and I pulled out the dip stick and a little sign on the dip stick said "B.J. for gas". I got a little flustered and shut the hood & said don't need oil. I got to get back to my broken tie rod. Sorry, guys I was just a dumb farm boy trying to get my Hemi powdered Ford fixed.

Tom
BTW
My Ford pic

[davec]

You should have seen the look on Mike D's face when 3 young, bikini'd hotties came into the garage to see what we were doing. The letch! He deserved to blow up that engine. The best part of the story was when I found the same exact car a month later (with 23,000 original miles) that needed all new electrical components, switches and fuse box. The next time Mike saw his car it was quite a bit lighter...

[majkos]

QUOTE (alpha434 @ Mar 23 2006, 10:37 AM)

I dunno. But one of the local guys didn't say anything when I hopped under his car with a sawzall and started cutting crap out from under it. Who did the stupid there? (IMG:http://www.914world.com/bbs2/html/emoticons/screwy.gif)

(IMG:http://www.914world.com/bbs2/html/emoticons/ohmy.gif) That was ME! (IMG:http://www.914world.com/bbs2/html/emoticons/finger.gif) (IMG:http://www.914world.com/bbs2/html/emoticons/ar15.gif)
Thought you know what you're doing! (IMG:http://www.914world.com/bbs2/html/emoticons/cool_shades.gif)

BTW it's a Track car,doesn' t need much under the rear trunk (IMG:http://www.914world.com/bbs2/html/emoticons/smash.gif)

[balljoint]

QUOTE (Thomas J Bliznik @ Mar 23 2006, 06:20 PM)

The driver said before you pump gas please check my oil.  She popped the hood and I pulled out the dip stick and a little sign on the dip stick said  "B.J. for gas".  I got a little flustered and shut the hood & said don't need oil.

(IMG:http://www.914world.com/bbs2/html/emoticons/av-943.gif)

(IMG:http://www.914world.com/bbs2/html/emoticons/chairfall.gif) (IMG:http://www.914world.com/bbs2/html/emoticons/chairfall.gif) (IMG:http://www.914world.com/bbs2/html/emoticons/chairfall.gif)



She forgot to take the sign off........and her Dad took it in the next week to fill up and check the oil.........

[Porcharu]

Heres another one that's non-914 related.
My brother was cleaning up after a long day working on an addition to ours parents house. He finds a big hole saw they were using for recessed lighting and the saw has a hunk of wood stuck in it. He decides that it would be a good idea to run a drill throught the wood and into the top of the hole saw - the drill would then pop the stuck wood out of the hole saw (IMG:http://www.914world.com/bbs2/html/emoticons/wacko.gif) . He grabs one of those fostner type bits (the self feeding ones) and chucks it up in a gear drive 1/2" drill (the ones that coast when you let off the trigger) and starts drilling. He manages to pick a drill bit that just fits through the mandril hole in the hole saw and is holding the hole saw in his hand. Of course the drill bit goes perfectly through the hole in the saw and rips through his hand.

The contractors had the drill unchucked from the drill and is dragging my brother to the truck to take him to the hospital as he passes out - what's wierd is he remembers hearing everything all the way to the hospital.
They get to the hospital and ALL of the doctors show up to see this guy with a bit ol' drill bit and a hole saw hanging from his hand.
My brother is still trying to get the X-ray. He says it was perfect and shows how the drill just missed all of the bones in his hand and the hole saw. It's all healed up and he's fine now.

[SGB]

1) I had a little bottle of paint that appeared to be perfect for the chips & dings...

2) I thought I heard a little exhaust leak...

3) The car seemed to pull to right just a little...

4) Those dim lights just had to result from bad grounds...

and most of all:

5) If I do the work myself...

[Joe Bob]

#1. While helping out fellow addict with his 6 conversion we get the /6 in and al buttoned up. Figure we'll take for a test drive and see how it feels. Hmmm oil gauge says 0 pressure at idle. Check oil and it's fine. Engine is a fresh build from a solid shop. Ok bad gauge. Second gauge shows 0 pressure. Man were are we finding these bad gauges?! Third gauge shows 0 pressure at idle also. Ok Let's run her around the block. Get 100 yards down the road and SCREEEEECH motors stops. After owing it back home with Land Rover we discover that someone has the oil lines on wrong, feed to return. I recall someone saying "Are you sure the oil lines are on right?" after the first gauge read zero pressue.

>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>

I just did that on my Type I....but on the advice of the builder of the engine. Cost me a new crank and a case for the "free advice"....

[Eddie Williams]

While I was crouched in the engine compartment, grinding and cutting my -4 motor mounts out, the grinder kicked back into my face. I saw stars after the weight of the grinder and my fists hit me in the cheek bone, knocked the safety glasses off my face. So I started to crawlout from underneath the car, when felt the warm wet stuff running down my face. It ground a line from the corner of my mouth to the pupil of my eye.

I don't have pictures of my face but can take some of my glasses.


I now have a full face shield for grinding and cutting, and I have the scars to remind me why.

[ClayPerrine]

Ok.. one that is non-914 related and I didn't do it. I just witnessed it.

Circa 1981. While installing an MSD box on a friend's Ford Torino, we pulled the hood off for more light. The installation caused the car to run very badly. During this time, my friend's brother and his friend show up, and they are falling down drunk. Brother's friend decides to climb up on the front of the Torino to watch us. He is sitting on the roof with his feet on the cowl.

The car is misfiring badly, and we can't figure out why (remember, the average age of the group is 17). Brother's friend feels that he must return the deposit on his beer, so he stands up with the intention of pissing in the fan to spray us with the piss.

Well, for those of you who don't know, a 351 Ford has the distributor in FRONT.

He hit the distributor squarely with the stream of piss. The resultant short through his family jewels and out the bottom of his bare feet into the cowl resulted in the car dying.

He was shocked so bad that he fell off the car into the grass, holding his injured family jewels. We were all laughing and joking at his expense, when somebody realized that he was turning funny colors and still screaming.

We called my friend's mom, who was a nurse. She asked what happened. We explained that he tried to pee in the fan,and hit the distributor.

He ended up in the hospital for 2 weeks, unable to piss. He had to have daily "extractions" of urine via a long needle inserted in his bladder. He also had testicles the size of grapefruits for 2 weeks. (IMG:http://www.914world.com/bbs2/html/emoticons/pinch.gif)

The problem with the Torino was cheap plug wires. After it got dark, there was a rather impressive light show on top of the distributor.



Up to the last time I saw him we were still asking him how they were hanging.

[ChrisFoley]

I had the manifolds/carbs off my race car to do a little work on them so I put bunched up paper towels in the intake ports to prevent dirt from getting in. I reinstalled the carbs and started to fire it up. Engine wouldn't run but would cough a little. (IMG:http://www.914world.com/bbs2/html/emoticons/WTF.gif)
After an hour of fussing around to find a problem the engine finally caught and ran, but what was that snowy stuff coming out of the tailpipe? (IMG:http://www.914world.com/bbs2/html/emoticons/ohmy.gif) A moment later the remains of all 4 paper towels came out the back end a little singed. (IMG:http://www.914world.com/bbs2/html/emoticons/shocked[1].gif)
Engine ran fine afterwards.

[sanman]

QUOTE (ClayPerrine @ Mar 23 2006, 03:00 PM)

Ok.. one that is non-914 related and I didn't do it. I just witnessed it. Circa 1981. While installing an MSD box on a friend's Ford Torino, we pulled the hood off for more light. The installation caused the car to run very badly. During this time, my friend's brother and his friend show up, and they are falling down drunk. Brother's friend decides to climb up on the front of the Torino to watch us. He is sitting on the roof with his feet on the cowl. The car is misfiring badly, and we can't figure out why (remember, the average age of the group is 17). Brother's friend feels that he must return the deposit on his beer, so he stands up with the intention of pissing in the fan to spray us with the piss. Well, for those of you who don't know, a 351 Ford has the distributor in FRONT. He hit the distributor squarely with the stream of piss. The resultant short through his family jewels and out the bottom of his bare feet into the cowl resulted in the car dying. He was shocked so bad that he fell off the car into the grass, holding his injured family jewels. We were all laughing and joking at his expense, when somebody realized that he was turning funny colors and still screaming. We called my friend's mom, who was a nurse. She asked what happened. We explained that he tried to pee in the fan,and hit the distributor. He ended up in the hospital for 2 weeks, unable to piss. He had to have daily "extractions" of urine via a long needle inserted in his bladder. He also had testicles the size of grapefruits for 2 weeks. (IMG:http://www.914world.com/bbs2/html/emoticons/pinch.gif) The problem with the Torino was cheap plug wires. After it got dark, there was a rather impressive light show on top of the distributor. Up to the last time I saw him we were still asking him how they were hanging.

NEVER PISS A CAR OFF (IMG:http://www.914world.com/bbs2/html/emoticons/laugh.gif) (IMG:http://www.914world.com/bbs2/html/emoticons/laugh.gif) (IMG:http://www.914world.com/bbs2/html/emoticons/laugh.gif) (IMG:http://www.914world.com/bbs2/html/emoticons/laugh.gif) (IMG:http://www.914world.com/bbs2/html/emoticons/laugh.gif) (IMG:http://www.914world.com/bbs2/html/emoticons/laugh.gif) (IMG:http://www.914world.com/bbs2/html/emoticons/laugh.gif) (IMG:http://www.914world.com/bbs2/html/emoticons/laugh.gif) (IMG:http://www.914world.com/bbs2/html/emoticons/laugh.gif) (IMG:http://www.914world.com/bbs2/html/emoticons/laugh.gif)

[Tom]

Guys , I would have posted this earlier, but I've been laughing too hard. Brings to mind a new passtime. Watching teener owners work on their cars. HA, HA. You guys are great. I must have done something like these some time ago , but due to advancing age , can't remember. Or was it that last knock in the head?
Keep up the good work.
Tom

[wbergtho]

OK...here's my two really stupid incident reports. #1: I was cruising slowly through my neighborhood when all of a sudden I heard the lug nuts falling off the driver's rear wheel. I gently slowed down to a stop and checked out the situation. 3 lug nuts had fallen off (didn't tighten any of them on that wheel). So, I try to limp it up to a friend's house about 1/4 of a mile away...OH YES...the wheel fell off. It stayed on the rotor and caused no damage to the car...but substantial damage to my ego when my neighbor friend came out to have a look and just rolled his eyes and shook his head. Incident report #2: I was jacking up my car in the rear jack point that I had fabricated into the trans mount...lifted the car about 20" above the ground. Didn't use jack stands...and the jack pad slid out of the jack point just 2 seconds after I got out of the way. Car fell straight down ripping a big gash into my rear FG bumper and tearing off my license plate in the process. TWO MISTAKES I"LL NEVER MAKE AGAIN. (IMG:http://www.914world.com/bbs2/html/emoticons/screwy.gif) (IMG:http://www.914world.com/bbs2/html/emoticons/wacko.gif) (IMG:http://www.914world.com/bbs2/html/emoticons/confused24.gif)

[J P Stein]

I've made only one bad mistake.......turning the first wrench
on the sumbitch.....I had no idea I'd be doing this (IMG:http://www.914world.com/bbs2/html/emoticons/dead horse.gif)
for the next 6 years.

[KELTY360]

(IMG:http://www.914world.com/bbs2/html/emoticons/chairfall.gif) (IMG:http://www.914world.com/bbs2/html/emoticons/chairfall.gif) (IMG:http://www.914world.com/bbs2/html/emoticons/chairfall.gif) (IMG:http://www.914world.com/bbs2/html/emoticons/chairfall.gif) (IMG:http://www.914world.com/bbs2/html/emoticons/chairfall.gif) (IMG:http://www.914world.com/bbs2/html/emoticons/chairfall.gif) Funny stuff.

Haven't had a chance to screw up under the teener yet, but one day I was under my '47 Lincoln replacing the return spring for the accelerator pedal. Did I mention it's a very stout spring? So I hook the spring to the top mount, grip the other end with my needle nose pliers and pull towards the bottom mount which is right above my face. When it's almost hooked, the spring breaks free, throwing my clenched gripping hand into my eye socket. Bam!********Stars orbiting around my head...standing 8 count. But no spring is going to get the best of me so I try again. Did I mention it was a stout spring? Same result. Bam!******** Had a shiner for a week and a half. Finally realized if I started the spring on the bottom mount and pulled away from my face I could hook it up without the punching bag effect.

Hey Sparky, you've got a real knack...any particular reason they call you Sparky?

Marc

[messix]

i'll never admit to anything. if you don' admit to it, it never happened.[i wish that works with ex wife.]

[Sparky]

QUOTE (KELTY360 @ Mar 23 2006, 08:41 PM)

Hey Sparky, you've got a real knack...any particular reason they call you Sparky? Marc

Well there was the time I "forgot" to put the battery hold down clamps back on the battery in my Shelby and took a big left hand sweeper about 20 mph faster then usual. Suddenly lost power and lights. As I coasted to the side I could see a thin stream of smoke coming out form under the hood. The battery had flipped thru the fan cutting the wiring harness and slicing open the battery. The "small" electrical fire cost me about 5K in work and so many dirty looks from the wife...

Then there was the time I was ripping up a bathrrom floor in my first house and discovered why knob and tube wiring is hazardous to a sawzall (IMG:http://www.914world.com/bbs2/html/emoticons/sawzall-smiley.gif) .

[dan10101]

Since wrenching for over 30 years, I have quite a few. But, most I've wiped out of my mind. It's great to have short term memory.

One I carry around with me...
I was working for Goodyear. Finally ordered Rivera Wheels to go on our 71 914. They were polished and looked great. I put either 195 or 205 50 15 Goodyears on it. The back tires were a very tight fit. (more on this coming soon). I had it up in the air and was trimming the inside of the fender lip so they wouldn't rub. But up in the air I couldn't tell how much space I had. So I put a floor jack under the the LR arm and raised it up into the fenderwell. I was clearing just enough so that it would trim the lettering off the outside of the tire, but not enough to cut into the tire itself. Then I had the bright idea of spinning the tire to make sure it would clear. Suddenly the tire stopped. I had a finder jammed inbetween the top of the fender and the tire. After I got over the shock of what I did, I spun the tire back the other way and freed my bloody didget. Work backed up that day as someone had to drive me to the Dr to get stiches. The boss said I was white and wouldn't let me drive. At least the tires didn't rub as long as I kept my fingers out of the way.