Ok quiet everyone, let's bring this meeting to order... I'll start. Hi... My name is Rob and I am an asshat...

Did you bring the wine and cheese?

Hello everyone, My name is Jason and I agree.....Rob is an Asshat.

Alright Jason, this meeting is for Asshats only... You have to leave now...

Hi everyone, I hope your all doing well since our last meeting. Rob, could you read the minutes from our last meeting. I believe it was titled "We're all asshats and you wish you knew us."

????

No, but I would like to eat his brains with a nice cianti and far far beans.

RIch

That would be "Fava beans"

and that's just sick

your point?

Do I ever have a point?

Do you need his address???

Timmerrhoid is the worst.......EVER!!!!!

group logo

Only the one that is covered by your hair....






Oops, sorry. I thought this was the insult thread!

not that I can recall....hmmmm.....nope I got nothing.

r

I figured my acknowledgment of your asshat-ness automatically qualified me for asshat status. Also let me be the first to second the nomination for our group logo.

In new business at the last meeting discussion was directed at the appointment of the Central Scrutinizer or "He who declares all asshats." Sir Andy was nominated and seconded and discussion was held. It was determined that Andy is never an asshat unless he was drunk and would therefore make a perfect Central Scrutinizer. Further discussion alleged that Andy is apparently never completely sober and therefore might not be such a good choice. Still further discussion explained that Andy's accuser in the sobriety matter was in fact an asshat and therefore not qualified to accuse.

MikeZ was then nominated and the room fell silent... We finally all got up and left.

Now that we're clear on that

I second the vote for MikeZ as KING of the asshats

Kind of unfair to call him KING. The position we hope to fill is actually the Central Scrutinizer - recognizer and declarer of all asshatedness...

Could you define asshat? Is it specific like bastard or bitch or dick for instance or is it a more generic term for a moron?

When a person is capable of sticking their head up their ass, they are wearing an asshat. AKA Butthead

Is there an official handshake?










































EEEWWWwwww never mind I don wanna now

i think that i should be considered a founding member and there fore i should not have to pay dues.

All that has posted here will be banned ........Doh me too

Left handed only.

Where's the politic police....

I demand paper with the other guy

Are we at war with Britain yet?

We are going to attack Canada first... I don't know why but I don't trust them guys... It's so damn cold and they are so happy... Except for the one guy who cut the other guys head off... That was a little bit moody.

come on up, glad to have you.

oh, would you mind picking up a couple of cases of Brad Penn oil? My supplier retired

ooh, and some Krispy Kreme original glazed. 'Hot' please.

thanks alot,

Krispy Kreme came blazing into town here and built 3 big stores. People lined up almost around the building. Then, the Adkins Diet came along. All three stores closed in short order. Soooooooooooooooooo They qualify as Asshats too!

Sorry, wrong door. I thought this was the American Homebrewers Association...

Nice try Todd! Get in here...

you know what sucks ? I mean REALLY sucks. I live in the land of Krispy Kreme. We had the largest pruduction facility right here in Richmond. I think it may have even started here. Anyhoo, I used to go there in the wee early hours after a night out drinking, and my buddies and myself would gorge ourselves on fresh hot off line doughnuts and milk. 3 years ago they tore down the original building and out up a freesh new modern unit. COOL looks really nice. BUT now you can't get the fresh hot ones....oh no you get the ones that have been sitting in the case for 2 hours. From what I understand the frewsh ones get immediately boxed and shiopped out to the stores. B.S. They will be cold by the time they arrive at the store so let US the customer at 3:00 a.m. get the good ones. We have done our time, we have alcohol that needs absorbing and we wil spend twice as much money because we will puke them all up and need to be refilled ATTICA ATTICA ATTICA I'm mad as hell and I won;t take anymore

I teared up a little bit reading scotty b's plaintive cry. I feel your pain, brother

in lieu of a handshake, which has been deemed unsanitary, or to the less open-mind perhaps even a bit I humbly submit something in the way of apparel.

Fred and Barney already have those cool Water Buffalo hats so they're out. Perhaps a snazzy vest; they could be made out of old Fuzzy Dash covers.

Except for the elected leader; his would be NOS

Krispy Kreme was started in Winston Salem, NC in 1937... ask me how I know.

Krispy Kreme

Who cares? Are you an asshat? This is a meeting... Stay on subject

He's on subject.....

The reason he's not getting hot donuts is he's responding to minutes from the AHA meeting....

Now If he wasn't, he wouldn't have that problem..

If it's any consolation, Krispy Kreme refuses to sell hot donuts so none of us who responded are elgible for the fresh hot ones.....

Love the way they have to hook every hot donut to the conveyer to keep it from floating off...

Yup, Winston Salem for the real deal.....

KennywishinghehadntrespondedsohecouldgethotKrispyKremes

You have a cat's ass on your head. Therefore, you are qualified. Continue with your new business... Asshat.

A hot Krispy Kreme is the nastiest thing that's ever been in my mouth. Melted in my mouth like a spoonful of Crisco.

sorry i'm late for the 7:30 meeting like the Asshat that i am, did i miss any thing?

Didn't the Asshats have a spin off group called the Peckerheads? or was it Visa-versa?

You guys have me on the floor

those peckerheads were the ones that just couldn't measure up to the standards of asshatery, so they got all pissed off and ran off to assemble their own group. they meet in a circle...... they're real jerks!

I just spoke to Lord Peckington, The King of Peckerheads, He said the Asshats wouldn't pay up their dues so they started their own group. The new group is a little more liberal and has more talent, being asshats that is.....

that peckerhead is Jerking you around!
they in no way have any talent as asshats! that is why they could only make it as peckerheads ! the only asshats that don't pay dues are those that are founding members. that is some thing that the peckerheads that tried to become asshats couldn't understand. and that further relegated them to being peckerheads.
as far as being more liberal, those peckerheads will let any old dickhead become a peckerhead! they have no standards!




they're so liberal they campaigned for Obama!

the Asshats are true blue and voted for Mc cain!

I think some of the new Asshat group is pushing the envelope talking about politics. There is the Asshat police, primarly founding Peckerheads, that look to ban the asshats who talk about politics and religon.

That's all I know about this subject,

We'll have to consult Wikipedia for more info and history.

First: I think you have mis-interpeted the term AH. A true AH started as an Ass Kisser. He (or She) went through their day AK'ing their boss. Until one day their boss stopped to get a drink from the fountain in the lobby at work. It was at that moment the AK turned into a Brown Noser. Now, Because the Brown Noser was now blinded by his own ambition it wasn't long before a slip of the lip turned into a full on Ass Hat wearing experience. So there are aspiring AK's and BN's chasing their boss all over the office and there are those true AH's who have achived Ass Hattedness and wear their Ass Hat proudly.

Oh, and I believe the Kiss from an Ass Hat was deemed unsanitary. Considering an Ass Hat was just two breif moments away from a Butt Kisser and one brief moment away from a Brown Noser.

And no ass hat could ever be worn over a buffalo hat. No matter how fuzzy and inviting that buffalo fur is, no ass would ever mount that thrown. The horns would prevent any true ass from becoming a real hat therefore preventing the continuation of the royal order of Ass Hattedness.

I'm not an alcoholic, I don't go to meetings. I'm a drunk.

I never really kissed a bosses ass but I was a server and bartender for many years before I went into real estate. I learned to get the best tips you had to kiss the customers ass. Now I have to kiss my clients asses

AA is for quitters